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Hoping for tomorrow

Posted by anonymous at May 2, 2012
Tags: Family  Juvenile problems  2012 May

Okay, well I'm not usually one to bitch about my problems, but I'm feeling pretty shitty right now, so I'll try venting and see if it helps. I'm aware my life isn't nearly as bad as many other people have it, so I'm sorry for complaining. I just need to get these feelings off my chest.
Well when I was about 2 or 3 my parents got divorced. I know, that's not nothing. But then, when I was 11 I lost my sister to a heroin overdose. 2 years after that my dad who I loved more than anything committed suicide. I didn't know what to do, but luckily enough, my good friends were there for me. Unfortunately my crazy mother decides to move me, my sister, and my stepdad halfway across the country.
Now I have another sister and brother who I rarely get to see on account they did not move with us. My mom doesn't understand me in the slightest, and is always trying to change me, especially my beliefs. My sister is just as crazy as my mom, and my stepdad doesn't even speak English. I've lived with him for 7 years and I still feel awkward whenever I try to communicate with him. He also treats my mom terribly, and yells at her for mistakes he himself makes.
I'm 15 years old and I want nothing more for highs school to end. I currently have no friends. I think it's the fact that I had a great life, makes me more depressed and more fixed on the past. But I know that's impossible, so I'm attempting to look towards the future. Anything but the present.
I'm so sorry for complaining, but I had to try something. I hope all your lives get better, and remember, you're all wonderful people. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. And if you're contemplating suicide, think of all the people you'll be upsetting. Just look forward for a better day. That's what I'm doing. Let's hope it works.


Similar Entries:
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Confused, Bored, and slightly suicidal May 16, 2012
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New Comment

By Cursed at 03,May,12 13:38

Awwww sweetie-
You are so brave! Only 15- you have a bigger heart than most adults. Please continue to be strong. You have suffered much, losing your sister and your father, I am so sorry... But you have to continue to forge ahead! Life is going to throw alot more crap at you, and you have to be prepared. Study hard in school. Don't worry about being popular or not having "friends". Friends are like the wind, they come into your life and they leave- Focus on you. Focus on what YOU want to acheive in life and not so much what everyone else has or wants. Life is a struggle and for you- it has been harder than most. But believe it or not, because you have been able to deal with some pretty tough blows, you'll be much more prepared to deal with life then your classmates!
Be strong-
You can do anything you put your mind to honey-
Take care,
Your friend,

By justme at 04,May,12 17:11

I wish I was as balanced and wise at 31 as you seem to be at 15. Truly inspiring.

By anonymous at 05,May,12 19:46

Go in the air force after high school. You will be doing something.

By online business at 12,Sep,13 15:12

wd96Ze Appreciate you sharing, great blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Great.

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