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Yes, this is how i feel..

Posted by greet at May 3, 2012
Tags: Juvenile problems  2012 May

I'm a 21yrs old girl and live in Indonesia. Everything starts in 2009 when I accepted at university. First, I enjoy all the subject and all my new friends, until I know that most of them think that I'm just a girl with no brain, can't think, and useless. I tried to be closer with them, but they just ignoring me. I tried so many times, but they keep ignoring me. They come to me when they just want something that they need, like money. And in 2011 I decided to leave that university. But they keep annoying me, in facebook, or SMS. I'm sick of that. Then I've deactive my account. But not just that.. I have no friends that really understand me. My best friend from college even slander and blackmail me. Ask for more money from me. I was drawning into sadness. I have a boyfriend, but he's kinda bit selfish. Everytime I tried to ssharing my day with him, he just yelling at me. I don't even say anything bad about him, why he's yelling at me? Am I wrong? When I got sad, and I didn't tell him why I'm sad, he's yelling at me again, he told me that I don't have a respect for him because I didn't tell him. In facebook, I find out that he's flirting with someone else.. I'm break down. I started to hurt myself, scratching my wirst, take a lot of pills and hoping that I died. For many times I did that. Now I have a brown mark in my wirst, and still hurt when I touch it. While I got depressed, a bad news come. I'm suffrerd a heart attack, because of the pills effect and my depression. Right now, my chest feels hurt everytime I'm sad. The docter said, I have to cheerfull, don't stress, and try to go to the gym. My boyfriend start to care about me, but he's still not 100
% changing. I have to say, don't even try to hurt yourself, or even killed yourself. It doesn't get anything right, and it makes you suffer from a disease. Just try to get used to it, smile, and you don't have to care with all the people who don't care about you. I know it's hard, but I'm trying too :)
God Bless You. Don't forget to pray :))


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