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the hits just keep on comin'

Posted by LM at May 14, 2012
Tags: Health  2012 May

As a kid, I was told to shut up so many times, I just quit talking except to say "please pass the gravy". My mother made it very clear from the start she didn't want me around, so I made friends with birds and squirrels climbing trees. Then I got a rare blood disease forcing me to be with her not only for doctor appointments, but also hospitals for all kinds of tests. I missed all of the second grade, and never caught up, so school was hard for me. She continued to belittle me and call me names the whole time I was growing up. When I got appendicitis at age 16, she didn't believe it, and neither did my stepfather. It took almost an hour of pleading, and finally, the surgeon said right before I went under, that I only had 20 more minutes before it would have ruptured. I left "home" when I turned 18, married a man a year later. He was older, and it didn't work out. He cheated on me after 6 months. I do have two good kids-they're grown now. 4 years ago, I was driving my van, and blacked-out behind the wheel. Never happened. Killed my van. At the hospital, the mri showed a BRAIN LESION-an entanglement of blood vessels which was the cause. I've been on meds-which really don't work, because I still have seizures. I go into trance-like walks and you can call my name but I don't reply. Now it's getting worse, because 2 wks. ago I passed out on the sidewalk, and someone called 911. I was put on a stretcher and shoved into their vehicle and taken to another hospital. I knew that if I gave my info they'd hit me w/a big bill, so I walked out. I really was lucky that when I fell on the cement, I didn't break my teeth. Now I'm wearing a medic-alert bracelet. So I'm trapped in a place I despise, sharing a crappy apt. w/a liar/lazy guy, can't work, on disability that barely pays anything, afraid to go out, no doctor because of the shitty medical system here, my freedom's gone, I'm really alone, and I'm so good at beating myself up because of the witch that was supposed to nurture me...ending it might be better PS I've left out a lot of other stuff like people ripping me off, etc.


New Comment

By anonymous at 15,May,12 09:11

I know life sucks but life got better for me when I went back to church and started praying.
By anonymous at 15,May,12 09:20

Amen. And adding to that.... The devil only comes to steal, kill and destroy. He is the father of lies.

Turn to God and see what happens. Jesus is waiting for you.
By at 15,May,12 11:54

By anonymous at 16,May,12 22:25

Well fuck off Lucifer

By Be Happy! :) at 15,May,12 16:40

If you feel lost and sad, don't give up. You love your kids, dont you? Spend time with them. Forget about your ex husband and your mother. If they were truly mean to you, then they are the devils. In times of need, turn to God and pray everyday. The nightmare will dissapear, I promise! :) Just DONT GIVE UP :)))

By anonymous at 15,May,12 16:40


By anonymous at 15,May,12 16:41

What Doesn't Kill U Makes U STRONGER!
By anonymous at 19,May,12 13:00

ehhehee what doesnt will u! bless

By anonymous at 15,May,12 22:19

Be strong. One day things will be ok. God puts this crap in your life to make you stronger. Then you will be happy
By anonymous at 16,May,12 05:05

Seriously? Like the brain lesion is just like a simple migraine and will go away the other day and she'll be happy afterwards? U, anon, are in a serious delusion and must need to get urself checked into the hospital before you start living in a complete fantasy that you have created on your own.

By anonymous at 16,May,12 05:19

Fuck. U'r in a seriously bad health condition and that, on its own, fucking sucks. Your remiss piece of shit you call mother, i hope, accidentaly falls down stairs, breaks her skanky skull and die. Fucking sluts like her don't deserve to breath the air.

By anonymous at 16,May,12 22:29

Your mother is a fucking bitch. How dare that whore treated you like that. At least you didn't grow up to be a selfish bastard like her.

By Karen at 17,May,12 05:03

Ima count 1,2,3 and then you pull the trigger. Ok, 1.....2....3 go!
By anonymous at 19,May,12 13:00

its um.......not that funny
By anonymous at 19,May,12 13:01

n dude how old are u 13?

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