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my fucking crazy ass life dude

Posted by anonymous at May 18, 2012
Tags: Childhood  2012 May

Well my names marilyn melendez my life has been sooo messed up I have been homeless for a long ass time...since I was 18 and I Am now 23...I have had a lot of jobs well actually I was in foster care so I have had a fucked up life since I was a baby...everything in my life has had hopelessness...I have always been HEARTBROKEN...everyday was hard. My mom was a drug addict my sperm doner never cared and abused me in everyway...I have always been hurt. I was sexually abused by my own fucking father and hit and threatened every single day I hoped and prayed that my mother would stop doing drugs and alcohol so she can help me. Everyday I looked in the mirror and gave up on my self I was a scared and lonely girl, I never had clothes and I never had love. So I turned eleven and my sister told my real mom what happened to me and them...so we got sent to foster care when I was 11. I have nightmares and sometimes I go into rages and drink and smoke before I used drugs...but when I was growing up my mom was always in rehabs I was always trying to survive and keep my head up. How can all this crap happen to me?? So I ran track in middle school ran cross country and track all in high school. Always came with a medal or trophy but nobody recognized it. I gratuated went to college still trying to finish college but I got adopted when I was 18 and I got kicked out at 18 I suffered so much in my adulthood..so grey so drunk..my ex used me...I can't believe I was so stupid...I still feel stupid I have tried to be strong I try to live life happy but sometimes I can't move on. I stay in the past and that's no good. Right now its 7 am it' s Friday I don't have a job I had a nightmare I have my brother living with me and my boyfriend and I have seven brothers and sisters nobody really talks to me...my life is crazy and sad I need to change it..clear my mind for peace. Help me god. What's my purpose..is this all you have in store for me is just hell.


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