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can't take it anymore

Posted by Bobby at June 2, 2012
Tags: Anxiety  Health  2012 June

i have had depression/anxiety for about the past 8 years. im 24 now and have tried almost every medication under the sun for depression, anxiety, even bi-polar disorder. the doctors never really could figure out why i am this way or how to treat it but have told me its so bad that i may never be able to work a steady job or go back to school for the rest of my life. i stayed at a few psychiatric hospitals which didnt help. the worst part is i have the greatest family who i love more than anything and who have tried to help me every step of the way and are still trying to find a doctor or medication to get me better. but for the past 9 months i have barely spoken to them which upsets them very much but i cant help it. i feel no happiness. i have a few good days maybe every 3 weeks or so but then im right back to severely depressed. it hurts me so much to know they are hurting. i wish i had a family that didnt care. i stay locked in my room for most of the day because im too depressed to be around them. i put on a lot of weight which is what depresses me the most now. i was always in top shape. now im not at all so i lost my confidence, my self esteem, and refuse to even leave the house. i think i went further than a block from my house twice in the past 9 months because im so embarassed of what i look like now. i have suicidal thoughts all the time and the only reason i havent killed myself is because i know it would destroy my family. it sucks. i want to just end it but i cant. i dont see things ever getting better. i dont see the point in living anymore.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 06,Jun,12 18:30

What happened 8 yrs ago that you think caused this?


By anonymous at 08,Jun,12 02:09

i have a fam who never help me seek help for my mental issues and called me weak and bitched at me for it... be thankful you have a fam who cares if u didnt i bet you would kill yourself now. i dont see a reason for your mental state and you seem to just be lazy! get off your ass stop making excuses and better yourself!!! be glad you got fam who is helping you...


By anonymous at 08,Jun,12 04:56

Whats impossible for man is possible for God.

Jesus can change you, he can help you and restore you. Get to know him. Take him at his word. I know of many people he has helped and changed. Its more than possible but you have to believe in him.

“And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” – Phil 4:19
‘Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10

Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully. 1 Peter 5:7 (AMP)
The Lord is good, a Strength and Stronghold in the day of trouble; He knows (recognizes, has knowledge of, and understands) those who take refuge and trust in Him. Nahum 1:7 (AMP)

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28

He loves you, he died on the cross for you. Ask him for forgivness of your sin, and he will wash away all of your sin. He can help you. Take him at his word, give it a shot.

Sincerely
By anonymous at 06,Jun,13 16:47

JW. Org


By anonymous at 09,Jun,12 06:26

Come on, just come on. Stop being such a bitch and go a head and do it. I'm pretty sure your family won't misses you. If anything they would be glad they got rid of a weak pussy like you.
By anonymous at 09,Jun,12 10:52

To the idiot above: Is that all you got? Because you sound like a broke record, telling people to kill themselves. It's getting old.
By anonymous at 12,Jun,12 14:57 Fold Up

shame on you


By anonymous at 13,Jun,12 19:50

im not even gonna respond to the douchebag that told me to kill myself...but to the person who said im lazy: you dont know me motherfucker so unless you have better advice i would suggest keeping your mouth shut. and lucky for you that youre name is anonymous if you catch my drift


By anonymous at 29,Aug,12 13:28

Reading this, was like reading my own life. i know how you feel!
By anonymous at 11,Oct,12 14:30

i second that


By anonymous at 31,Aug,12 20:36

I know homw you feel. I hate the felling of hopelessness. To be happy one day and down the next. To feel that you are making progress only to be kicked down and finding it hard to get up. I live for my daughters as I know it would hurt them if I was gone. My Mother committed suicide and I see what I can do. I have been through that, divorce, B.k and now the loss of my job. Your family loves you remember that. Don't destroy your family. As much as you hurt you will give them a lifetime of hurt. I pray a lot and at times feel my prays aren't answered. But then I look and see that I did make it throught this day so perhaps my prayers are being answered. Love yourself. Don't let weight be an issue as you are a great person inside. Go and exercise and walk. It will help you.


By anonymous at 15,Oct,12 00:17

I feel like I wrote this. I think about suicide everyday. I pray it doesn't come to that


By anonymous at 01,Dec,12 05:48

I understand how you feel I have a disorder too but I am taking meds for it try joining a group that has similar problems it may help to talk about it with people who understand and seek out a good counselor. I know I need to do the same.


By anonymous at 12,Feb,13 03:59

Try Clonodine for the anxiety and diet, exercise and sunshine for the depression. I have the same bullshit.


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By Karina at 05,May,13 16:05

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