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Stress

Posted by anonymous at June 13, 2012
Tags: 2012 June  Juvenile problems

I'm 14. My mother is an alcoholic. She leaves all the time because my father finds the beer cans she hides and confronts her about it, and then she comes back the later that night. I ask her to stay because leaving can only make things worse, but she says that my father doesn't even care about her and so she should leave. I told her that I cared and asked her if that was a good enough reason to stay...she replied with a simple "no". She did this tonight. She took about $80 from my wallet from a recent trip i went on for our school band (I almost cried on the way home knowing what awaited me at home. She also left with three beer cans. She leaves, it gets dark, and we (my father and I, since my brother is rarely at home) and I cry myself to sleep those nights. Last year, on the last day of school in grade 7, my mother and father got in a heated fight upstairs while my brother and I tried to block out the yelling downstairs.My mom then stormed downstairs, went into the kitchen and grabbed a large knife, held it to her wrist and yelled to my dad, "is this what you want? Huh? Do you want to see this? I'll do it!" right in front of my brother and I. I started crying hysterically, and my brother and I went into the backyard where we hugged for about ten minutes, just standing on our patio, not knowing what happened inside, hoping that my mom was alive. She was, but later tried to leave. My brother got her stay, how he did I'll never know. We had an "intervention" type thing that night just amongst the four of us, and my parents went back to a happy loving couple, like everything was okay. This happens everytime she drinks. It's a cycle. She'll drink, and no one will say anything because we aren't 100% sure. Then my father will confront her about it. They'll either have a big fight and won't talk for awhile, or she'll leave and then come back, and then they'll fight and not talk to each other for awhile. Then, they'll have another big fight, and then they'll go back to normal. She won't drink for a week. And then she'll start again. And the cycle repeats. I don't know how much longer I can take this. I've had too many nights where I couldnt finish school work because I was crying or sulking about this endless circle. I'm slowly spiraling into depression because of the constant stress. It's becoming hard to hide my mother's alcoholism from my friend who comes over to my house all the time after school. I'm worried she'll find out and tell people. I'm already an extremely emotional person, and with graduation coming up, I'm accumulating too much stress. The sadness and anger if my mother's drinking. The sadness of leaving my old school. The fear of my friend finding out about this secret. It's too much.


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Comments:
By Cursed at 22,Jun,12 12:00

Hi sweetie-
It breaks my heart to hear of your suffering. You're mum is unhappy and drinking to cope. Unfortunately, she is destroying her life, and the chance to have a loving and healthy relationship with her family. It is all very sad. When people drink, they are usually suppressing deep seeded hurt/anger. Alcohol is extremely addicting and cheap (compared to other drugs). I have seen severe alcoholism working in the ICU of the local hospital. It's so devastating, because they just can't stop- even though they know they are literally killing themselves. I don't necessarily want to say that your mum is being selfish, but she is. I'm sure she has her reasons for drinking (we all do) but when children are involved, it's basically throwing in everyone's face that alcohol/drugs are more important than their children. She needs a detox. If the family intervention didn't work, it's going to take placing her in an environment where she can't get her hands on the drug of choice. This is a very traumatic step and unfortunately unless court ordered, you can't "make" her do anything. Alcohol in my opinion is one of the most evasive and toxic drugs available. It's promoted, romanticized, and cheap. It takes a while to see the devastating effects of alcohol, but eventually it does catch up. Destroying the insides much faster than the outside. Almost invisible. You sweetie are between a rock and a hard place. Children of alcoholics suffer the most, as they are innocent bystanders. You're basically having to watch helplessly as your mum slowly dies. I am so sorry. My advice is to convince your dad and your brother to have another intervention and really push having her sign into a drug addiction program- usually a month. It takes about that amount of time to truly get the toxins out and stop the cravings. What makes the situation imperative, is that you yourself will have to be really careful about alcohol. If you start to drink, you too could become just as attached to it... something to ponder. My dear, you are wise beyond your years. I am sure that between you, your brother, and your father- you can heal your mum. She isn't going to be happy or thrilled about entering a rehab, but at this point, it sounds like the best option. If it takes guilt, manipulation, or coercion, then do it. In the long run, it will be worth the effort. When she is sober and has found the root of her sadness, she will be so thankful that you stuck by her and together, helped to pull her out of the darkness that she has fallen into..
I wish you luck honey-
Be strong, and help to make your mum a happier person-
Cursed
By Vinegar Douche at 23,Jun,12 09:47

Give us some relief.
By Cursed at 24,Jun,12 13:47

The douche thing's played out. New material bud. If you're going to insult me and entertain all the other trolls on here, you're gonna have to come up with something a bit more creative. But alas, perhaps your walnut sized brain can't handle that, and it's ok- maybe you should get some paint by number or silly puddy?


By anonymous at 26,Jun,12 13:45

I wanna butt fuck someone give me a big juciy cock in my butt hole


By anonymous at 05,Jul,12 18:45

I'd reiterate everything Cursed said, and give you a big hug if I could. You sound like a great kid. You're 14. What do you want to do with YOUR life? You'll be an adult in 4 years. Off to college. Don't let your grades slip in the process. Take some of the focus off your Mom, and put it on yourself. Take it from me. My parents' lives were shit, and so is mine. Now all I can do is hope my own kids fair better. Do things for yourself.


By Jordan 8 Scarpe at 08,Jan,15 09:42

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