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untitled story

Posted by Nick at June 14, 2012
Tags: Attitude  2012 June

In Office Space where Peter tells the hypnotherapist that everyday is the worst day of his life, that is how I am feeling right now. The strangest thing is that everything in my life is great. I have just graduated from University, landed one of the best jobs in my field, I have a great family and a great girlfriend but I am completely miserable. I feel so trapped by their expectations of me, but what is worse I am trapped by my expectations for myself. There is a major disjunction between who I am and the life that I am living. I don't know how much longer I can keep this charade up. I have tried so long to fake it until I make it, but it seems I have wasted so much of time and wronged so many people the way I have behaved and squandered so many opportunities to truly be happy, to truly be myself. I want to run away from everything, but I know that would a futile attempt because the person I want to run away from is myself, and no matter how far I go I know he will eventually catch up to me.

I have long been contemplating what exactly I want to escape from but I come up empty handed with results and so I am left with this feeling of complete helpless misery. I can graduate from school, find a good job, convince people to love me and like my company but in pursing all these frivoles goals I must have missed something important. Something important but how to live, about how to be happy with myself. I know how fortunate I am, born in a first world country with affluent parents who care about me, but still I have let them down, I have let myself down, maybe the expectation of being happy is too much for me. But these thoughts have thrown me into very deep depression like I am trying to climb a hill of ice, never to reach to top, only to make my way up a bit and then slip back down.


New Comment

By Truth at 22,Jun,12 19:24

One day I woke up hung over pretty bad and for a moment I felt like what you just posted, but then I saw the huge fucking tits of the bitch I just bedded the night before so I started feeling better, and then she rolled over and there was a tramp stamp on her back that said "You're welcome"....then I felt great about that, but then she farted , long and loud, so I felt a little let down too, and lost the mood. So you see, in any situation there are ups and down, but you just gotta look at the big picture. Is your life one big loud and long fart, or does it have huge boobies with a tramp stamp that says "You're welcome" on it?

If you're honest, then I think you go with the tits option, but if not then I'd like to punch you so hard that when you come back from next week you can give me the mega millions power ball lotto number so we can win all those millions.

Also, stop calling it university. It's college. You sound like either a Canadian or a fag.

I would hate you, but you already hate yourself as much as you can be hated, so I'll save my hate for someone else.

By anonymous at 23,Jun,12 00:51

Why is a college graduate looking for advice from stangers on the internet? I would have thought someone with your education would have better exposure to resources or people who you could trust. This place is for folks on their last straw willing to accept abuse from people like Truth.
By stinker at 23,Jun,12 00:57

but you gotta admit, it's funny shit.

By anonymous at 25,Jun,12 11:01

truth is lying, only thing he ever bedded with is his hand
By anonymous at 30,Jun,12 00:31

seriously, that's all you got? I suspect you're a cock taker

By anonymous at 25,Jun,12 16:28

did you get that memo?

By anonymous at 27,Jun,12 22:30

I know what you mean. I think you could just talk over your feelings with a therapist. Your problems are just your perception, not real problems.

By anonymous at 30,Jun,12 21:01

Oh boo-hoo, I feel trapped in my perfect life that most people would be more than grateful to have. You are the kind of person who will never be happy with anything.

By anonymous at 02,Jul,12 03:42

Go to peaceful pill handbook dot com and see about ordering a helium hood aka exit bag. seems to be a great way to do it, you just lose consciousness very fast and then drift away. off yourself peacefully, just assemble it, crinkle the bag up on top of your head so there is no air in it, open the tank and exhale then pull the hood down over your head and take a deep breath in, you will pass out almost instantly and never wake up.
may you find peace
By anonymous at 09,Jul,12 19:47

fuck you for suggesting this as an alternative-btw-it is not always peaceful to go out this way-severe panic occurs due to a reflex that kicks in.

By Dicks at 05,Jul,12 02:51

Do you want to know what I think? I think that you are a stupid, spoiled brat. Go turn gay or something, then you'll have something to complain about. What a fucking fag.

Go and rot in your grey, vapid world stripped of any iota of authenticity. Or have gay buttsex, it's fucking underrated.

By anonymous at 18,Jul,12 17:32

oh my gosh. i cannot even express what i think about this. You have a great family, girlfriend, and job?? Boo fucking hoo,what a horrible life you must be living. Try having no family that cares for you, living a lonely life with no job. People these days just LOOK for things to complain about. Stop being a spoiled brat you ungrateful turd.

By anonymous at 08,Aug,12 15:27


By anonymous at 16,Aug,12 17:11

I wish you people wouldnt make me angry so often. Im cursing and insulting like a lunatic. Stop pissing me off people.

By anonymous at 21,Aug,12 01:59

i continue. Fuck girls and women. Most of you are evil. I hate you fucking sluts.

By anonymous at 22,Aug,12 19:25

The world is a shithole ruled by evil.

By anonymous at 01,Sep,12 02:07

and to all you who harassed me on this website I say FUCK YOU ASSHOLES.

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