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I understand your frustrations- making it on a single income trying to raise children with no help from a "dead-beat" dad, it must have been overwhelming at times? It's unfortunate that your children are disrespectful and ungrateful. We try our best to "provide" for our loved ones, but sometimes it seems like it's never enough! Hopefully, your kids will outgrow their selfishness. They will have to "grow" up now that they have babies themselves. I don't think people understand that once you have a child- you no longer are number one, and must put your children first. The responsibilities of raising children, can be a thankless task. But you are strong- you've had to be! And I am sure once your children become older, they too will realize just how unappreciative they were and regret being so self-centered.
As far as your relationship with your husband is concerned, try to talk with him. People fall in and out of love all the time. Stress, financial woes, infidelity, children, can tear
relationships apart. But it sounds like your husband is a good man- not abusive, and you do have two other children with him... Don't give up. Relationships are never a walk in the park. You have to take the good with the bad- no relationship is perfect, and if someone claims their's is, then they are either lying or in denial. Partners argue, vent, but hopefully in a manner that is constructive. Communicate with your man, let him know how you feel, and if all else fails, go to a marriage counselor. But I bet you can work it out if you put the effort forth...
Instill good things in your grandchildren, they will bring joy into your life- And remember, you are not alone in your suffering.
Best of luck-
Cursed
the idea that love can sustain itself for more than even a few years is a goddamn myth
you are upset because life isn't a fairy tale?
here's an idea, save up an take the kids to disney world
may you find peace
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