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All hope is lost

Posted by Help me at July 3, 2012
Tags: Jul2012

I don't know what to do anymore. Everything I love turns to shit. I've always been that guy..the guy who supports you and lifts you up. If you needed help, Ide be there, ready to go and dully prepared. If you need anything. I'm your man.
But... Sadly.. no one I've ever helped has ever been there for me, and when I can't face everything on my own anymore, instead of anyone lifting a finger, I get judged, crucified, beat down, and left behind. Finally, I burst.
I've been in a relationship for 5 years, and it has taken its toll on me immensely. Sacrifices, compromises, and I've been there for her at every turn, even when I had nothing left. She was depressed, and wouldn't find a job to help pay the bills. I sucked it up and worked harder to compensate. It's been a struggle for years. It almost seems like when anyone I know is having a problem, I'm there with open arms. But when I'm down, or I do something wrong, instead of anyone saying " Gee I wonder if he is ok. He's not himself. Are you alright? Do you need any help?" Instead, it sounds more like "
Well you're being an asshole, and you better shape up and handle your problems if you're going to worthy of my time." I hate my life, and want to die. I'm so sick of being kind, and just getting screwed in the end. Of all the things I've learned, 3 run true.
Trust gets you killed, love gets you hurt, and being real gets you hated.


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Similar Entries:
Seriously? March 27, 2012
Love Lost November 29, 2011
Lonely  April 12, 2011
Desolation May 24, 2012
hopeless January 22, 2012



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Comments:
By anonymous at 06,Feb,13 14:24

I feel you . But think of it this way . YOU'RE the one that makes all these problems for yourself . BUT you can change it . I understand that you love your Girlfriend , but come on . Get real . You need to throw all those 'friends' out and handle it . You don't need people to help you . And even if they did help you I'm pretty sure they'll expect something much greater in return or they'll use it against you . I think you should encourage your girlfriend to find a job . If she doesn't then , you either just be friends or you work harder to support the both of you . STOP BEING NICE , it's KILLING YOU ! Man up and be strict . Don't go out of your way to accomodate people that wouldn't do the same for you . Take care of yourself FIRST then others come second . Ok ? I wish you the best of luck in life and I hope that your girlfriend realizes that you have your plate full and I hope she gets out of her depression and becomes the once-lady you fell for (:


By anonymous at 26,Feb,13 14:37

You sound like a classic 'nice guy'. (google the term)

Do you have kids with your 'girlfriend'? If not, then rejoice. You can be free...you can learn and move on.

Everything about your personality can be fixed with a different mindset. What do you want in life? That is THE question....if you don't know what you want, you are likely not to get it. STOP worrying about the needs of others....instead ask yourself, what do each of these relationships do for me. What do I get out of this relationship? I'm not suggesting you become a selfish bastard, but relationships should benefit all parties. The only one truly looking out for you...is you. People place all kinds of expectations on you. So do not hesitate to place expectations on them. Set personal boundaries and enforce them. If you act like a doormat, people will treat you like one.


By anonymous at 08,Mar,13 22:46

please don't pay attention to these people telling you to change and be awful like them. this world needs more people like you, even if it doesn't appreciate them. You know that "Be Kind Anyway" saying? well it applies here. be nice anyway, because it's not about how unappreciative and awful people act toward you, it's about how you act, how you conduct and carry yourself, how you express yourself to the world, and it's a good thing. Do you want to be a source of good, or do you want to be a source of the same awfulness that has made your life suck?

At the same time, people truly will take everything you've got if you let them, most of them have no inkling of an understanding of a healthy mutually supportive relationship, etc. The only thing you can do is have some serious boundaries. Whatever you go into, know that you can't really expect positive reciprocation from the other person. If you do something nice, do it because that's what you're going to do, not because you think the person will have some common sense and return it in kind some day. And if the person is asking a little too much, or getting a little too comfortable taking from you, or if you just don't feel like being nice to them that day because you need some recharge for yourself, say no. And defend that no with all you've got.

In this unfortunate state that we currently live, with our completely disintegrated communities, all you can do is you. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be nice. After all we're all in the same sucky situation.


By Bobby at 20,May,16 02:33

I don't even know what to say, this made things so much eaiser!


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