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Why The FUCK am i STILL HERE!

Posted by Carlos at August 3, 2010
Tags: Abuse  2010 August  Family

When i was 7 i was raped several times by my mother, father and my brother. im 16 and have had atleast 14broken bones because of my parents beating me and they did nothing about it. im mexican and attending a mexican high school and i am constantly called a beaner and other racist names. when i turned 21 i was kicked out of my house and my mum and dad got a restraining order against because i saw someone about the abuse and they were fined. when i was 23 i asked my mum for money and my dad choked me for a while. at age 25 i started stealing to keep up with my drug addiction. Now i have been caught stealing a car and served 1year in jail. i got out and was depressed. i hated myself and attemped to kill myself several times FML.......

Why am i still alive?


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Comments:
By at 14,Aug,10 13:12

At first, stop taking drugs. I think, you are smart enough to understand that they can do only harm.
Secondly, try to make some money other way. Just think of something you are really good in.
And my last advice... Make a dream of yours. Dreams can be very good when you don't want to live. It must be something that you can do with your own strength.
Good luck! I wish everything would be ok! Don't kill yourself! Please! I'm begging you!


By anonymous at 17,Aug,10 14:34

Just do not harm yourself, otherwise you lose!
your parents know that they have abused you and treated you like complete shit, get into that unfair world and make something of yourself! and when you become someone show them whose boss make them feel like crap.


By anonymous at 20,Aug,10 14:07

A drug addicted thief. Now you know why people hate Mexicans (Taco-niggers). Go home to Mexico.
Before you call me racist, and other names, I have traveled to Mexico several times and found Mexicans to be some of the nicest people in the world. Unfortunately, second generation Mexican immigrants turn out to be mostly lazy swine and vermin. Honest Mexicans stay home, while the criminal types sneak across out border and continue their life of crime and misbehavior.
By anonymous at 05,Sep,12 14:28

You are a completely uneducated excuse of a human being! This person has had a rough life to this point and you racially bash them? Stereo types are what causes hate and your a prime example! Life is hard rich or poor, no mAtter your race! I had to stop and fettle some of this because I didn't want to look like this person by just hating on him! Learn compassion it will help everyone.
By anonymous at 18,Feb,16 00:28 Fold Up

HOW BOUT YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP INBRED REDNECK PIECE OF SHIT!!!!


By anonymous at 20,Aug,10 22:03

I'll bet there is a lot that you left out. I'll bet you were a pain in the ass and not the victim. Your family probably had enough of you and kicked your ass. Drug addicts ALWAYS have a point of view that they are victims when in reality they ARE the problem.


By anonymous at 29,Aug,10 18:39

"Why am i still alive?"

Dude, cuz you haven't tried hard enough. Put some gusto into it! Get a gun and blow your brains out or something. Make it happen.

Actually, the first part of your story if frickin' TERRIBLE. I'm really and truly sorry that any of that had to happen. However, I must admit that - pain or not - I substance abuse and people who engage in that type of activity SO much that I kind've loose all compassion for a person at that point.

Stop abusing. If you don't stop . . . then get that gun, baby. You know what to do. :)


By anonymous at 22,Dec,10 08:11

God forbid! don't listen to the negative talk.
Do you really want a different life? I'm asking you. Look deep within yourself and give a very honest answer.

Jesus said, "WHOSOEVER WILL may come!" That includes you, sweetheart. You just have to have the will to find the positive things. It may be a very, very long road for you, but you're the only one who can REALLY stop you!


By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 22:07

I Hate Humans. I Dislike People. Take it however you want, We are as corrupt as we have made ourselves to be. So I suppose, In the end of days, we shall reap what we have sown.


By anonymous at 13,Oct,11 10:10

ok, stop with the drugs that will save you money and keep you healthy.
stop stealing your gonna get caugh and sent back to jail so get a job a real job any where


By anonymous at 23,Nov,11 10:49

You are still alive because even though your life sucks, you are older and independent and you can help other people who are in your position. You are still on this earth to help others. Don't ever say "I can't". You can do anything that someone who is happy can do. You can save people, help people, make others happy, protect them from what happened to you, even if you can never hope to be happy. That's why you're still alive. It's your choice: you can try to fight your demons by trying to help others or you can continue trying to fight your demons by trying to be happy through drugs, etc.


By at 26,Nov,11 08:25

I rellay needed to find this info, thank God!


By anonymous at 13,Dec,11 18:14

cant give you any reasons. I can tell you i hate what you have been thru OMG i hate people who do these horrid acts. Youve walked in teh darkest times possible now find the Light. Find that something that holds you up and even makes you so happy. Ask your Spirit Guides to reveal the reasons for such severe testing and that will give you some answers. I cant erase your pain or i would! I would give you time without the pain so you can find your way.... Im so sorry. I wish i had better words and there are people who do....seek out those that have knowledge of Life, those that can help you see the good man u will become. Your hard times got to be over! Youve suffered enough now look for the Light!!


By anonymous at 19,Feb,12 23:26

I don't think this story is real at all... someone is trying to stir people against mexicans ..and by the comments seems to be working! :S


By anonymous at 27,May,12 01:55

I been through a bunch of crap I can't talk about. I did finally stop drinking about 13 years ago, also stopped the drugs. After that lost everything, mostly due to unscrupulous people. But it was all crap before too, and since. Ive come up with only one thing now, that I do draw strength from. Evil is trying to consume us all. And I won't give the bastard the pleasure of consuming me. Evil may kill me off one day, but I won't do it's bidding. When Im sad I will cry, when Im happy I will laugh. I will hold my anger in check, and I will be kind.


By anonymous at 02,Jun,12 00:21

Lost my kid cause he couldn't stop doing drugs and I didn't know how to reach him.

If you are on drugs, get off'em. Get help from family,
church, doctor, hospital, if necessary from cops and courts. Just get help.


By anonymous at 20,Aug,12 11:10

=(


By anonymous at 22,Oct,12 19:01

you're still here because you're strong enough at surviving the worst!


By anonymous at 05,May,13 20:49

If you really have to ask why youre still alive then you need to see someone about the way youre feeling cause obviously youre hurt. When I was 16 years old I lost my mom dad three sisters and one of my brothers in a car accident my other brother was left brain dead, and I had to make the desicion to pull the plug on him as he wouldnt get any better. I am the last person in my family that is still alive after the accident, and I used to ask myself that same question. I found my answer but everyone's answer is found in different ways you need to find that for yourself brother. good luck and take a new outlook on life quit trying to get pity from people and deal with it thatts the only way to get better from all of this trust me man.


By anonymous at 17,May,13 00:05

Let me tell you, do not ever feel that there is no need for you to be here! I will begin by telliung you that as a child I was physically abused by my step father. He would beat me for any excuse that he could find, whether it be 10 minutes late getting home or forgetting to put out the garbage. You name it! Any reason he could find was reason to beat me!!!
I remember this one time that he put his hands around my throat and began to strangle me. I was always terrorized in anticipation of his beatings or during...but this one day a peaceful feeling came over me.
Its weird!
I was only about 9/10 yrs.old. I thought to myself "Thank God, Im going to die now and never have to endure anymore beatings.
I rthank God now that I am not dead!
There is a reason for all of us.
Today I have 3 children, all who love me, and need me. Had I died or took my life, like so many times I thought of to end the terror. I would not have been able to contribute 3 beautiful lives,ambassodors of respect, to this world!
life is precious!.We all have a reason to be here, needed by somebody.
Im glad I never followed through with my suicide plans. It would have devastated my siblings, mother and family. I hope you are still here and PLEASE...never think that you are not needed or better off not here!
We all have a purpose.
suicide is aN EASY, GREEDY, WAY OUT...YOU ONLY HURT THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE AND THE ONES WHO LOVE YOU!
GOD BLESS YOU, AND ANYBODY WHO EVER CONTEMPLATES TAKING THEIR LIFE......I CARE ABOUT YOU!
WORD!!!!!!!!


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