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Waiting for the end

Posted by not-so-good-at-much at August 23, 2010
Tags: 2010 August  Environment  Juvenile problems

Si most of my life I have spent alone. There are people around but Im still alone. When I was one my mother abandoned me at the babysitters. My father found me a week later but then he abandoned me at Grandmas house. At 9 my mothe came back and stole me from grandma. She didnt really even want mem she only wanted the extra welfare money to support her drug habit. As I got older her druggie friends were always around (prostitutes and crack heads, pimps and drug dealers) and the men were pigs. I caught them cooking crack in the kitchen and I got hit. There cooking dope and I get smack for walkin in my kitchen. Her peice of shit friend tried to turn me out but I ran, never saw her again. She died 4 years later and I never got to say goodbye. My baby was only 3 months old and she was the only good thing I ever did.

Im married now, happily for 13 years, or so I thought. He doesnt want me anymore. Another one tossing me aside as if I were just trash. He will leave me, they always do because I am the one that is noy so good at much, but at least I try. I count the days til my baby gorl can take care of herself so I can end this miserable so called life. I am tired of being scared all the time, I am tired of worrying that they will leave, I am tired....


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Similar Entries:
Just waiting. February 27, 2012
Waiting to leave this world. December 27, 2009
Wow. Life is so crappy. June 15, 2010
Waiting May 15, 2012
35 and life August 14, 2011



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Comments:
By anonymous at 18,Sep,10 02:55

TO: not-so-good-at-much

Life can suck, but do not let others dictate to you. You are worth something, they are the ones who are not. Yes this world is coming to an end and you will be sitting up there at the right hand of God.

Forget about all those who try to make you feel useless. It is they who are useless. They know it and try to corrupt you with THEIR corruption.

They will perish at the hand of God!!!

God Loves You...remember that!


By anonymous at 17,Oct,10 00:28

Amen to that last comment. Can't wait. Justice will be served.
Hey Waiting.. I am sorry. Really there is no one outside of God that can help. Even He is silent most of the damn time and I have no idea why. Maybe through this you will know how to help others who are going through problems. Can you come visit us at www.lifebyphil.com as my new friend? We would appreciate your comments since you have been through so much trouble in life. I think people would listen to someone who has gone through such abuse and neglect. There are a lot of people who need to be helped out there. Maybe you can be part of their hope by just making a comment on one of the articles. Phil


By anonymous at 25,Jul,11 14:49

Aww ((hugs)) Sorry to hear about it...

You've really been through a lot and look you've turned out reasonably well, with a girl worth living for!! She'll need you even when she's older, you know!!

Way too many divorces happen these days, some people don't think before doing something rash... and may make the same mistakes next time.. At least you can reflect on what went wrong and learn from the experience... And yeah, maybe help others too...

Hope it's gotten better since last year...


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By anonymous at 06,Jun,13 21:08

My mom also abandoned me, my brothers and sisters. It was 6 of us altogether. We were scattered all over the place. Living w/ ppl who didn't really welcome us. I tried killing myself twice but it didn't work. I'm still here and I've managed to live my life for me. Even though my mom is still living, I have no connection to her whatsoever. My life is better without her being in it. You can make ur life better also. Keep living so u can be in ur daughter's life. Live to see ur grandchildren. You said that u r tired so get some energy. Take walk somewhere. Pretty yourself up. Hair. Make-up. Decent clothes. Your man just might stay. If he leaves, show him what he'll be missing. DO ALL OF THESE THINGS FOR YOURSELF.


By Nike Foamposite One at 15,Oct,14 10:11

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By Jaylan at 15,May,17 01:09

That's a wise answer to a tricky quetsion


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