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PIECE OF SHIT

Posted by anonymous at December 20, 2010
Tags: Alcohol  2010 December  Family

My whole life is a constant shit storm ever since i could remember. I grew up while my parents were all alcoholics dad was a drug user and a cheating SOB my mother had a short temper goes well wit the alcohol. I d been beatin and whipped for things that i had been small harmless inncidents. I grew up in rough neighborhoods even been mildly molested by a boy that was a sick pervert and i never knew it was wrong becus i was too young and too stupid. My parents were as ways being caught by Police for dui. I stayed wit my little sister at my grandmothers house until my parents get out of jail then they make more kids (my youngrr sibbs) to share the wonderful experience im goin through i caught my dad cheating wit another woman in bed at age 7. He would get drunk as usual and tell me he was gonna kill himself that noone appreciates him. Dad always beating mom. My aunts and uncles dont care but us but themselves. As i got older in my teens dad and mom were still drinkin and mom thot i stole mom from her so she came at me wit a knife i had no choice but act in self defense so i struct my own mother to get away from her. I usaully stayed a frens to forget what is goin on back home and leaving my younger sibbs wit them. I vowed id never be like my parents especially my father. My parents kept talkin about me when im in close proximity where they knew i could hear them theyd say imma a piece of shit, worthless piece of shit, piece of chicken shit and fuckin little fucker. Then and there i was tempted to take my own life i tempted to hang myself in our storage home from the ceilling but little sibbs were watchin me and i couldnt do it in front of them. As time went on dad and mom were still the same. Mom would always blame us kids for her and dads drinking and being tossed in jail. I would think about death everyday and welcoming it to. As i got older my frens left me (the ones i relied on) but there was one fren who was there for me he always take me out the bad evironment that was in. He was truely a good fren he was my best fren. Until one one nite i asked him if he would like to kick bak and drink some brewskis and bs as we usually do. We both got pretty thrashed he took me home he drove me home and to went to his as i thot. It turned out he drove off the road killing himself. I was damaged i was torn apart i was on the verge of jumping off the cliff but i couldnt make it i was too torn apart i drank even more. I was down on everything and i still am... from 2000 to 2010 ive been in ten auto accidentstwo off them due to alcohol... and more than half of them ive shouldve been dead...(wishful thinking there).
Now im 29 years i dont drink anymore cus i got married. I still think of death cutting my wrists and thinking of ways to die. My luck still has not changed i totaled my wifes car last monday and within a week i totaled my inlaws truck by hittin a cow late at nite.... im always expecting the worst now.... this is my piece of shit life.... i got my wife she still loves me but beginning to think how long will this last?


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