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it could be worse i guess its jus getting there

Posted by pathedic loser at January 24, 2011
Tags: Family  2011 January  Job  Relationship

Its very hard to be optimistic when my life stays shitty. I'm a 32 year old single parent female, I have three kids two baby daddys both who have abused me raped me and treated me like crap. I had a decent job til about a year ago I lost it and now I work a crappy job barely get by. I lost my dad 8 years ago and since then my 72 year old mother has been very hard to deal with. To be honest I've never felt very loved my whole life and I yearn for anyone to love me. I'm not very pretty but I'm not the ugliest I don't think it doesn't matter if I was because I'm easily taken advantage of because I'm always tryna help everyone out. I want to be inlove so bad I think I imagine being inlove all the time and no matter how bad a man treats me I claim I love them. I have mad trust issues with good reason because I've never had a good reason to trust anyone. I have bad anger I can feel the anger in my bones it hurts so much. I've found myself in a relationship of 6 months where he has beat me up once but he calls me names and makes me feel like garbage and I have good reason to believe he is cheating and I can't help but believe he is only with me because of money car ect. My whole family hates me part of it because I'm a white girl who is only attracted to black men and my kids are mixed. My two oldest children are 13 11 year old girls who argue with me and don't take me very seriously. I have a crappy house car and I dropped out in 12th grade of high school I've tried to go back I'm jus not capable of it. I've pretty much fucked my whole life up. I'm constantly wishing I was dead or thinking bout killing myself and I cry myself to sleep like every nite. No friends either no one to talk to no one cares


Similar Entries:
yes life sucks February 11, 2012
I lost faith in myself March 15, 2012
My wasted life May 2, 2011
??????????????? March 14, 2010
My life is worse than yours, stfu. March 15, 2012

New Comment

By anonymous at 21,Feb,11 16:01

rafmebrolol @ yahoo . com i'll talk to you I dont have anyone to talk to either at least we can talk to each other :-)

By anonymous at 21,Feb,11 17:39

Yeah, that sucks. I just had a really shitty day but damn: I'm really glad I'm not you.
By anonymous at 21,Feb,11 23:31

rude:glad I'm not you, proper way: glad I am not in your position.

I am not even American, blue blazes learn to speak rednecks!

By anonymous at 22,Feb,11 14:45

Didn't get the rape part, two baby daddys who have abused me, Babies can't abuse their parents neither rape them
Perhaps it's just my decent english

By anonymous at 22,Feb,11 21:13

i'm pretty sure your kids love you, but believe me, at that age, they're just too young to know it and show it. You're not the only one with a crappy life, you can take for granted, that everyone who coments or tells a story here, feels pretty much the same way. At least I do. I guess we just have to "hang in there" and wait for something good to happen.

(sorry for my bad english, but I'm not american either... im mexican)

By anonymous at 25,Feb,11 02:49

Another piece of trash with lots of kids and no money hahahahahaha pathetic fucking loser.

By anonymous at 25,Feb,11 02:51

Your a nigger loving piece of white trailer trash and i hope you enjoy you life of misery. Fuck you you stupid whore.

By anonymous at 25,Feb,11 12:21

What is you dear deal??? Who ever post that last two messages are just idiots that somehow manages to have a meaning in their life by making good people feel bad. To you two grow up and get a life. Stop enforcing your own shitty misery to others.
Honey I know life must b hard, and everyone that is here can relate to it but you know what, the beauty of lice is that as much as fuck up as it might seem there is always a door that will lead us to happiness just hang in there.

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