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LIFE SUCKS!!!!!!!!

Posted by ME at February 18, 2011
Tags: Attitude  2011 February  Loneliness  Meaninglessness

I am sitting here on a Friday night alone again, so many lonely days and nights. I have bi polar disorder which makes everything even worse. I have made huge mistakes in my life starting with the men I have chosen in my life. When I was younger I had alot of friends but they slowly faded out of my life. I have no one and the only thing I am good at is being a mom. If it were not for my children I would probably end it all. I am so tired of feeling worthless, the only thing I can do is cry. Noone ever warned me that being an adult completely sucks or that you become a single mom when the father decides he has had enough. Single parents are the ones who sacrafice everything including their own life for the sake of their children. I am 33 years old and I feel like my life has slipped away from my control. Why is life so miserable? I am in school for my bachelor degree in psychology but then what is the point, not like I will be able to find work even with that. I can not deal with this anymore. I dream of something more I pray for something more. With each passing day I lose more hope that things will ever get better. I cant even find a relationship but seriously who would want to get involved with a single mom too much hassle to deal with. All I seem to attract or sociopaths. My youngest son will be two soon and I was even assaulted by his father when I was pregnant with him. Lord have mercy on my soul because I am not strong enough to go on like this anymore.


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New Comment

By anonymous at 09,Mar,11 20:03

You will never truely know what it is like to be all alone you have brought a life into this world. To that life you are everything and I would hope that, that life is everything to you to. I would like you to think how it is for a Man who has no kids and has no friends and has no women you work go home work and go home day after day and have no one to do Anything with, To me it sounds like you have Alot to live for to me you sound Pretty Dam Lucky. Try going home after working and the house is empty you go to bed and your alone you wake up and your alone the only sound you here is made by you. So yes Life Sucks but for all of us it Realy could be worse lets just hope we have Hit Rock Bottom and doesn't get any worse just better I know Your life Will get better. You will never truly know what it is like to be alone You will never be alone...

By anonymous at 09,Mar,11 22:00

I am a loner myself. I tell you this feeling sucks. Each day seemed very long and difficult to pass. I understand u very much. But take it easy. Loner can think of great stuffs. Albert einstein is also a loner and has no social skills but look at how successful he is. Plan your stuffs well and set new goals. For me, is to be a loner but be a doctor and help people. At least your this life will not be wasted, and the good deeds that you do get you prepared for a better next life. :)

By anonymous at 09,Mar,11 23:28

By anonymous at 02,Apr,11 18:13

I like this guy.

By anonymous at 12,Mar,11 13:57

bad :(

By anonymous at 15,Mar,11 20:49

I am sorry that you feel this way. Please remember faith in God will get you out of this mess... I am dealing with my mother dying, losing my job, and ending up in Jail (after losing my job) when I got drunk at a bar..Things always look bad until you realize the most precious things that you have are right infront of you and inside you..

By anonymous at 22,Mar,11 12:56

Lady you are stronger than you think. Secondly your children need you so much.
What kind of a man do you want to attract, because they are out there so get your girlie magnets working. I feel sorry for men as they are always hunting but at the end of the day it's the woman who choose who they want, the men don't have that privilege. Apart from super models who just get everything.
So you are a psychologist, pardon me that is something to be very proud of, but give the pride to Christ.
You need a friend, I will be a friend whom you will never meet, I will be a friend you can trust but never see, I will be your friend when you need me and when you don't.
Do not become damaged goods by reminding yourself of past beatings. They happened you survived because you are super woman, no one can take that away from you, except you.
When you down, spend time with your kids. Order them to give you a back massage and bring you flowers. They love you, and they would love to do these things for you.
I will pray for you, I pray to God to lift your spirit that you may feel the sunshines' warmth, that you will once again feel joy and split your lips from smiling so much, that you will find a man to be your pillar of strength, mr fix it, and if not, remember Jesus said:" I will be the father they never had."
If I were closer to you I would take you out on a night of your life, I would get your eyes sparkling, your heart thumping and your blood bubbling. That's probably never going to happen, because we are I bet on two opposite sides of the Earth.
Lady you are strong enough. You are. I bet if more nonsensce came into your life you would have the strength to do it, but keep telling yourself you can't. Try not to let your emotions win your heart, leave that for a man to do. It just feels better.
So every morning from now on, say your prayers, make yourself beautiful, put on the sunshine and turn up the volume, you CAN do it, mom.

By anonymous at 10,Apr,11 12:26

Focus on your child and please try to find meaning and happiness through molding them to a great person. Don't feel that you need to be in a relationship. You don't. And having a child, I would be reluctant to enter into any relationship unless slowly. Your purpose now is greater than yourself so remember that.

By anonymous at 19,Jun,11 17:37

I am a 49 year old male without children and feel very much the same way. I ruined a couple of relationships and stayed in a job I hated thinking I'd have time to change course at some time. I am a child of alcoholic parents and have substance abuse issues myself. I am also bi-polar but it was diagnosed late in life even though I had told doctors of my concerns. I'm finally on meds for it but I still feel much like you. You are lucky you have kids and you take pride in being a mom. I suggest you think about your hobbies or what your dream job would be. Then think about how you could make money from your hobby or take the first step to get that dream job. You are young and nothing is out of reach. I really feel for you, I have been as low as you can get and have hit bottom with my drinking but life has a lot to offer if you can focus your attention on one thing. So give it some thought, then choose one simple thing you want to do or change then put all your energy and focus into it. If you do you can't fail, then you move to the next thing and your confidence will grow and you will continue to gain ground. Every day try to make one thing happen that improves your life, as simple as doing all your laundry to reaching out to a friend you haven't talk to in a while. Paint a wall in your house or wash your car. Just start trying to improve and then it gets contagious. The best thing you can do is start to workout, start simple and add each week. The chemical release will have a feel good effect and it won't take long if you stick to it, that you pull out of the funk. I admit it is easier said than done and I have struggled for months at a time but these suggestions have worked well for me. Best of luck but never give up, you have kids depending on you and the healthier you are the better chance they will have in their own life. Peace..

By anonymous at 19,Jun,11 17:48

Remember this, Love will never never come when you are looking for it. Love finds you. You when you can improve yourself and your self image improves you will become more attractive to the men who are best suited for you, so focus on yourself, improve yourself and then love will come to you. You can't force it or you will be in another relationship that will leave you unhappy or worse..

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