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What to do...

Posted by Reject9000 at March 3, 2011
Tags: Drugs  Family  2011 March  Meaninglessness

Well this is a long story but it might put your life in persepecive...

Well, I guess we'll start at the beginning. I was born in 1987, on the coast of California. My mom was a saint but my dad was a drunk. We lived in a pop out trailer for the first few years of my life, we were one step away from homeless. In 1989, my mother, pregnant with my little brother and seeking protection from my violent, abusive, drunkert of a father; traveled back to my grandparents home in Pennsylvania where I currently reside. My mother then found herself involved with a drug addicted boyfriend who was also abusive both physically and mentally. Put me and my brother in the hospital several times. After years of living with this maniac my mother once again becomes preganant with my little sister. A few years later, my mother trying to proctect us, takes us to a shelter for abused women. Things start to look up until my mom once again gets involved with another man who was a drinker. We end up moving in with him, much to my objection. He turns into another asshole, drinks all the time and keeps me and my brother locked in the basement when we weren't at school. Just before finishing high school, I get informed that my father had commited suicide. Immediatly after high school I am kicked out on my 18 birthday, forced to live in my truck. About 2 weeks later my friend takes me in. I become heavily involved in drugs, alcohol and sex, it consumes my life for several years. I start to clean up my act and mature. I now work 55 hour weeks at a crappy low paying job and live in a camper, I guess im right back where I started. I am proud that I survived this long but sometimes it all seems pointless, I dont know what to do with my life now that I'm on my own. I only wish I had some direction.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 20,Mar,11 09:21

I know how you feel, but you are still young. You still have time. You'll get better. Would be much worse if you occurred in similar situation when you are over 40.


By anonymous at 20,Mar,11 11:40

I think that you have been through many tought situations and seem to have grown from them. I am impressed on how you have managed to pull yourself out from those situations. Stay strong :)


By anonymous at 20,Mar,11 20:53

create something.


By anonymous at 20,Mar,11 22:20

I know this may sound cliche but keep your eyes upon God. He will give you the direction you need. I have been married for 20yrs. My husband is an alcoholic, he is sober now. I prayed for him for 15yrs. God does answer our prayers maybe not in our timing but he does. You have a great testimony to share with others. After everything you have been through and you are still here i know God has a plan for your life. I don't mean to be offensive or over bearing I just know that God is the only answer he will provide you with strength, wisdom, love, joy and direction. Good luck with your life.


By anonymous at 21,Mar,11 13:06

The easiest thing is to blame everything on your fucked up childhood. But only you make your choices. Get a grip and fix your life, it's never too late.
By anonymous at 22,Mar,11 22:15

you say that alot


By anonymous at 10,Apr,11 12:20

I'm sorry about the challenges life has given you. I can't understand how parents have children and then expose them to horrible situations. Keep working hard. You're a real success story and you should feel proud of where you're at. I know you might not feel that way, but reading your story, that's how I see it.


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