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Life is a b8tch...

Posted by HDM at March 10, 2011
Tags: Juvenile problems  2011 March  Poverty  School

MY LIFE SUCKS FORREAL!!! I'm 15 and I have lived in poverty for 5 years.5 YEARS!! We left Cincy in 2006 and moved to tha asshole capitol of tha world, Alabama. Everybody at my school hated me and thought that I was a retarded dumbass. What buncha lame ass niggaz. I couldn't stand getting up in tha morning, just tha thought of it made me sick. We lived in an old, run- down apt. with no furniture and couldn't afford any clothes of food. We slept on airbeds. There were roaches everywhere. I was sick.But we finally left that terrible lifestyle in 2009. We had no idea what was in store fo us back in our hometown of Cincinnati. So we arrived in Cincy in early 2010 and I was in the 8th grade. I hated my new school. Everybody thought I was lame and dumb,nobody cared. There were many times during tha school year that I wished that I could die or shoot or stab myself in tha heart. But things go better at school, not a whole lot tho, and graduation was sweet. But tha whole summer was spent driving around places that put you in a run- down apt. somewhere badd. I couldn't stp thinkin about tha 8th grade graduation and how awesome it was, nor could I stop thinkin about tha school I wanted to go to in August. August came and I got to go to my school that I thought that I would like...for 5 days. Then we had to move to Kentucky across tha river and I had to go to a terrible prep school. I was still poor, we were living in a run- d0wn hotel with 22-year-old matresses to sleep on. My family was,and still is to this day, tha only one too poor to afford a home and too poor to buy clothes and food. Money was and still is nowhere to be found in our place. I'm failing tha 9th grade and feel like my life is about to end. I wis that I could just die right now. I'm also tha only full-black, non-mixed black person in tha entire school, out of 550 kids, 7-12 grade. I hate my school. I hate my life. And I hate me. Nobody at my school has no remorse for me when I'm down, which is pretty much everyday that I wake up in tha morning. My school is hell, and my assisstant principal is satin, tha devil himself. He's a rasist. Nobody at my school understands me or my life situation. Today, nobody cares, and tomorrow they still won't. My life is filled with broken dreams. I HATE MY LIFE! I WANNA DIE RIGHT NOW! SOMEBODY COME AND RESCUE ME....


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By ME at 24,Mar,11 08:48

I am really sorry to hear all that. Try to pass the 9th grade and the next ones to come. Be good at what you do, be good to people (although some deserve to be kicked in the ass), and sooner or later you'll find a friend, somebody that doesn't care about how much or how less you have.
Keep trying =)

By anonymous at 24,Mar,11 17:35

so youre the only fully black dude at school. be proud and show everyone what youre all about. Im a Chicano writing this by the way. I see lots of justifiable anger in your writing. Use that anger in a positive way. Kind of like in a "me vs the world" stance. Look for activities like athletics and academics, such as spending time at the school library. A book that helped me out a lot in that respect was the autobiography of malcolm x. malcolm grew up poor and had a sad childhood, but that wouldnt stop him from being intelligent and a leader for his people. I really do wish the best for you youngster. if you need someone to talk to. keep your head up man!

By capoerista at 15,May,11 08:49

school sucked for me too mate, sorry to hear about your experiences. Maybe check this out its a afrobrazilian martial art, with african roots and traditons still very much embedded in it. Its a way to step out of your life and engage with something positive an gets you fit like you wouldn't believe! Wish I'd have found it when I was at school might have eased the pain a little ;0) Hang in there, you'll be grown soon enough and the stuff youre laying down now will be the foundations for later; I don't mean school grades I mean your philosophy of life, everyone has one and it molds them, the only thing you can change in the world is your responses to it.
p.s heres a vid of the capoeira group in action

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