In short.. this is my situation: Im a 21 year old student who just found out that he failed University... after two years. I know right? Two years of my life wasted in the library, in lectures, in classes, listening to theory that nobody ever applies in real life. 20.000$ debt, and worst of all.. I have nothing to show for. I have no job prospect.. I dont even know what I should do now. I still need to tell my parents about it, and even though I know they won't be mad at me, they will be dissappointed. And that cuts deep... This isn't even the main issue though. The main issue is that I just don't know what to do with my life. Im average in all criterias in life.. I have nothing what I stand out for. Im a bad student(obviously lulz), I cant play an instrument, I don't do any sports, I look average, I had only two serious gf's in my life, and both those relationships caused nothing but pain... I have no motivation, I don't have a lively personality, I can't laugh at much, Im not funny. Ive learnt that one must focus on their good qualities, but i seriously have none. My best friend moved to Europe, and we barely ever speak. That dude was my right hand man (no homo)Loved him, and he accepted everything about me. Everyday I get angry... angry at all these idiots that i speak to every day. I get angry at these girls I know I can't get, angry at me not being able to do anything productive, angry of being enslaved into this backwards society full of judgement, angry at douchebags, angry at fake people that act really nice to you, but when it gets to it, wouldn't do anything for you... We live in this sick world of competition. Of people wanting to see you fail. I hate watching news because it depresses me. I dont know anymore... I seriously have NO clue what i need to do... I hate education systems, I hate grocery stores, I hate the DMV, I hate all these man-made institutes and objects in life that turns Humans into mindless drones that follow the herd. I hate government systems, I hate legal systems... Im just so sick of this materialistic world that creates more issues than answers. I really like the thought of how native americans used to live. Hunt for your food, spend time with your friends and familie without tv, videogames etc. Having natural endorfines flow through your brain from the result of natural processes in your body. Because following an education, and sitting in an office 8 hours a day is not natural. It goes against anything thats natural. I think one finds complete happyness when living an instinct-based life. A life where one eats, excersises, loves on the basis of what the body tells the mind to do. That, in my opinion, would lead to perfect happyness... But ofcourse that would never happen in this day and age. A person working in a factory everyday for a minimum wage, is no differrent than a high class lawyer or banker that contributes to the denaturalization of our world. Or think if it this way: How can it be, that out of all animal species, depression only occurs in the Human species, and only in other species when their surrounding is affected by Humans. And I know people will say "Because we have different intellectual capacity, abilities etc." but thats completely irrelevant since other species have different intellects and abilities from us. Birds can fly, Dolphins can do math. Who else knows what they can do, but what they don't do is make eachother miserable like the Human species. Anyway, those are my 2 cents. I know nobody really cares, and since I will probably never tell this to anybody in the real, its probably the biggest waist (well.. not really since I wasted two years of my life at a University, that was suppost to give me a piece of paper saying i know a bunch of theory, which I can use to proove to other people that I know it... its absurd). People.. I believe that the root of depression for most people lies in the simple fact that this world is so complicated and un-natural. And future generations will only suffer more under this, except for the narrow-minded, naive, oblivious fools that feel that this is how its supposed to be. I wish I could start changing this... but I can't. Im not the type of person to stand up and speak his mind. I need to think of things to do that make me happy real quick before i loose my mind. Im lonely... not in the sense that Im looking for a gf, but lonely in the sense that this world is so backwards.