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Life sucks, 22 years counting

Posted by anonymous at May 25, 2011
Tags: Anxiety  Job  2011 May  Poverty

Well im not sure why the fuck im writing this, but here it goes anyway.

i was brought up being told not what i can achieve, but what will happen with my life if i dont, i was always made clear we were poor and could'nt afford what others can, there's nothing wrong with being told that but it got driven into me so much so that ive become mentally scared of life, i have extreme anxiety, cant talk propely and have been miserable all my life. This has obviously meant very little in terms of friends and no girlfriends.

ive managed to push myself through, im now 21 (22 tomorrow)and lifes been sucking for almost 22 years. It got worse 2 weeks ago, i got fired!!! from my first real job for making a stupid stupid mistake(very schoolboy), was getting paid about £375 a week (before tax), it was a great job and the company was one i could secured my future with.

Anyway, I’m not sat at home on my ass and so depressed that that my hairs falling out, I’m breaking out in acne and I’m getting liver pains (yes all are symptoms of depression)

I come from a poor background, my parents are getting old, they’ve looked after me growing up and they themselves have had a hard life and coming from poverty. It SHOULD NOW be my turn to look after them, so much pressure on my shoulders and ive known it my whole life, i frankly don’t care about my welfare, but i feel like I’ve let my parents down.

The jobs market is so shit, it will be a long time before i find a job that pays anywhere near that and it will almost defiantly be a much harder job. Im just praying for any job right now.

God (i still have faith in you), guide me through these hard times.


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Similar Entries:
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New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 08,Jun,11 17:13

I agree it's very tough out there, but don't be so hard on yourself. This is your first job! Do you know how many jobs I've been fired from... lol. That's just the reality of working in America today; jobs come and go. You just have to keep pushing. If you got fired you should be entitled to unemployment benefits; please tell me you've applied for unemployment as that's what your entitled to.
Hopefully that will cover you until you get another job.

The job market is pretty much a joke, I know alot of people out of work and everyone goes through this. Its very rare that someone is lucky enough to have never experienced being fired, so keep applying to positions, collect unemployment and you'll be fine.
By anonymous at 09,Jun,11 07:12

Being fired was the worst feeling in the world, its now been 5-6 weeks and im still depressed, when i apply for other jobs i cant list that job as work experience, becuase here in the UK before getting employed they almost always call you previous employer for a reference.
Which means my application will show no previous professional work experience, and also no employment for the past year or so.

You get £52/week in unemployment benefits, its not much at all. £15/week of that goes to car insurance.


By anonymous at 09,Jun,11 00:52

I know that living in the UK is exceptionally hard now, probably much more so than in the USA. Don't you kinda want to smack Prince Charles and the rest of the royals a little bit?
At least you got done with school before all the budget cuts.


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