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Stuck in Hell

Posted by Tormented at July 23, 2011
Tags: Attitude  Health  2011 July  Sexuality

I read through the topics here and I'm sorry but most of you are just whining about minor crap thinking you have it bad, I would trade places with any of you any day...

I am a disabled guy with a severe health condition that has left me relying on my parents to take care of me. I have lost my independence, all my friends, my job and I have no social life because i can no longer get outside to do things by myself.

The worst part is I caused my own disability by doing something really stupid which I don't want to say here because there may be people out there who could recognize me from my story. I did something harmful to myself because I was so upset about being gay and attracted to younger boys.

Life is so horrible and cruel for some of us because you don't get to choose who you feel attracted to and for me I turned out to be a god dam monster because I find little boys attractive and that makes me a fucking pedophile. Its heartbreaking and a nightmare of a situation to be in, I would do anything to be normal but I'm not and every day I just wish I could die.

Love is such a precious gift and I have been denied something so precious and meaningful because I can never be in a relationship, I can never be loved or be with anyone because my attraction is wrong and inappropriate. I have to spend my entire fucking life alone and isolated never knowing or feeling love because I just don't have any feelings for adults.

On top of all that crap I also have this disability and I feel totally damaged both emotionally and physically. I spend everyday by myself, my bedroom has become like my prison cell and when I look outside it makes me cry because I see a world I can never be part of, I am missing out on life and there is no cure both for my disability and for being a pedophile, the only cure for me is death but because of my parents I have to put up with this shit life just so they don't get hurt by my suicide.


Votes:


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Comments:
By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 10:45

Its good you know your a sick puppy. Try and get help via a shrink. As a deviant, your no different than other gays.....only the law (for now) and common sense keep you from acting on your demented desires. Get some religion if you the shrink dont work for ya.
By anonymous at 13,Sep,11 05:31

With all the priests molesting children now-a-days, I would stay far away from that. It would only enable his behavior. And there's nothing wrong with being gay.


By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 12:18

yes you are sick and belong in a prison you retard? oh and by the way its not ok to love little boys!???? you honostly think a kid can be capable of love with an adult? your fucking sick bastard. you need help and not the kind where people try and help u because that wont do you any good because as you mentioned already you cant change.
By anonymous at 13,Sep,11 14:15

You belong in prison for being such a retarded cock sucker that dosen't know how to read. GO BACK ND READ HIS RESPONSE, HE CLEARLY SAID "I can never be loved or be with anyone because my attraction is wrong and inappropriate." SO HE DOESN'T NEED YOUR RETARDED TRASH TALK!!
By Tormented at 15,Sep,11 13:14 Fold Up

Its funny how you think you are better than me but the reality is you are a really bad person, much much worse than me. All I have is feelings of love for younger people, you however are full of hate.

You use sexuality as a tool to discriminate and you fail at life and you fail at reading because I never said anything about "kid can be capable of love with an adult" you're the one who said that, so don't try to put your own crap in my mouth you idiot, Obviously you're the sick perverted one if you're going to bring up that type of love between kids and adults.

I never said anything about acting on my attraction but obviously your a deceptive bastard that lies about people trying to imply shit I never even said. If there is a retard here its you, in fact you made me feel so lucky that I am not a retard bigot like you that hates on innocent people. thank god the world isn't full of idiots like you that try to throw people in prison for being born with feelings of love towards younger people. Who the fuck do you think you are trying to condemn me for existing with the feelings I have, you know what I hope to god you have a child that ends up becoming a pedophile, someone as ignorant and full of hate like you deserves it, lets hope you don't end up drowning your own kid in the bath tub


By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 13:48

Being gay is OK, liking 18 year old guys is ok, but if you're saying you want to have sex with minor aged boys then I hate to say this but... I'm glad you're not in a position to harm an innocent child.


By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 19:31

Well, pedophiles can get psychotropic medicine which can help you with the issue of being attracted to young boys. That's what you have to do if You, god forbid, don't want to destroy one family's life. Shrink, the medicine mentioned above, everything to not do what Your sick brain is telling You to do. And if You're only attracted to little children, then remove a certain organ (balls), and you'll just have to learn to live with no sex. I'm ugly as hell, but I don't go out and rape women. I can't even go to a whore cause I'm too shy to do that, yet I'm not going to do any harm to any woman. EVER. Be the first pedo giving example (I know it sounds funny but what the hell). And my bedroom is also almost a cell.


By anonymous at 12,Sep,11 20:51

There seems to be alot of these motherfuckers on here. is this so rampant+ or it it all the same person, no because some comments have been supportive to this freak. We wondery why kids cant go outside anymore. they are imprisoned in thier homes because the outside world is congested with more pedos than ever since the advent of internet pornography. a quarter of all pornography on the internet is Child porn, why because thats where porn spirals down, it goes lower and lower into the lowest common denominator. find someone to love for a lifetime, on you same walk of life, in you age group, you cant use people and throw them away every three years like disposable blow up dolls and call it love, it hurtful and sick. these boys go on to molest their siblings because they dont know its wrong till they hit adulthood, they begin thinking of sex too early so when they hit the age of knowing they feel like sick scum for molesting their peers or siblings and the siblings themselves have to deal with incest which is even worse because they have to hold a family secret for decades if not all their life and it changes the dynamic of their family. In short it ruins lives and only a person of complete selfish ignorance would think it is harmless and okay. its wrong. My big brother was molested. I know many others.


By anonymous at 13,Sep,11 00:17

Leave this man alone. I feel for him. IMAGINE not being able to be yourself because of the emotions you feel. that is the saddest thing I know.
By anonymous at 15,Sep,11 15:16

It doesn't matter what anyone says this man is sick and he can't change. It also doesnt matter that he hasnt acted out his fantasies because he will eventually.
By anonymous at 05,Oct,11 12:14

Are you speaking from experience ?


By dhruv at 13,Sep,11 03:45

I feel for you and hope god gives you some peace eventutally. You have high moral values and irrespecctive of what people say its true that some feelings cannot be controlled. Does anyone realise this guy would rather kill himslef than hurt a child. Dont compare him to molesters, he didnt rape a child


By at 13,Sep,11 06:15

Why are all you people on this man's case for being attracted to children? You act like he wants his feelings. He never admitted to actually having sex with a child, so what's the issue? Shit.

Anyway dude, I hate to say it and you don't have to do this, but it probably would be better off for you to kill yourself or have someone you trust euthanize you. It's nearly impossible for you to live a productive life in the state of mind you're in. If I were in your situation, that's would I would do. You will no longer have to live your life in fear, pain, and isolation and you will be in that state of absence like before you were born (unless you're religious, then you're going to hell but that's all bullshit imo). No worries. You will also take some burden off of your parents. They'll be upset for a while, but realize one day they'll be too old to take care of you, and will hardly be able to take care of themselves. I've seen it happen. Again, that's just my opinion.

If you want to press start and continue life, find a way to make it better for yourself. You're gay (which is perfectly fine in the 21 century, fuck the religious freaks), you attracted to guys over 16? If so, go online and find a boyfriend. If not and you feel you have to get off to child porn, don't act on it. If you do, try not to get caught watching it, your life will be 1000x worse in prison on some sex offender charges. If anything, just PLEASE do not molest a child and you'll be fine. You may have to live a life of celibacy but it's not as bad as it seems, some people do it. If you can't find sexual love, find love in another form. Life, friends, a hobby, or some other productive shit. Other than that, talk to a councilor or just anybody and make sure you tell them everything you just typed here. It's the only way you'll get past it if you want to live a regular life. Oh and try to become independent cause as I said, your parents wont be there forever. Good luck with that, PEACE.

P.S. what did you do to yourself, cut off your penis or something? Damn. That's my guess.


By anonymous at 13,Sep,11 14:12

Yes people are very sick!! and I am not referring to the person who wrote the topic I am talking about the idiots who commented.

FIRST OF ALL LEARN TO READ YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!! He said he had the feelings but never acted on it and would never act on it which is why he is upset about dying alone. Yet you fucking illiterate cunts are saying shit like he belongs in prison and preaching to him about kids not being capable of relationship! YOU THINK HE DOESN'T FUCKING KNOW THAT YOU DUMBFUCK?? If he thought it was okay to have sex with kids when wouldn't be complaining about the loneliness and lack of love. sex and romance!! Use your fucking brains you fucking MORONS!! That's if you have any intelligence!
By anonymous at 15,Sep,11 15:22

why the fuck would you even fucking mention something like this then?!? If you thought you were going to get a bunch of support for being fucked up obviously you were wrong? Go get real help or keep getting help. ahh fuck this shit its a waste of time fuck him
By anonymous at 11,Nov,11 08:35 Fold Up

Couldnt have said it better.


By Tormented at 15,Sep,11 13:22

Everyone thank you for your understanding and support, except for that one idiot who said I should go to prison for having an attraction that he doesn't approve of and he tried to lie about me implying I was a child molester or at risk of acting on my attraction when I never said anything like that, I hope he burns in hell.


By anonymous at 19,Sep,11 02:19

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE UP VIDEO GAMES.
Seriously. Video games destroyed my relationships with my girlfriend and my family. They are all consuming.

If you start now, and get addicted (which you will), then you won't ever think about anything else.

You can have fun from your bedroom, you don't need any physical ability.

Seriously video games should be prescribed for people like you. It will save you!
By anonymous at 10,Nov,11 15:45

Ride on dude! Video games made me a loser too!
By anonymous at 10,Nov,11 15:47 Fold Up

But aren't video games one of the many tricks these pedo's use to plant their cock up some unsuspecting child's ass?


By at 22,Sep,11 22:30

do you drive a white van? you are a fucking retarted sicko!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By anonymous at 23,Sep,11 08:46

Are you a waste of sperm? cause its sounds like you are!

Also sounds like you swallow a lot of it too! fucking ignorant cocksucker!


By anonymous at 23,Oct,11 02:06

you need to work through and comprehend your issue. you are all miscalibrated and jumbled and that is what causes your perversion. lot of people develop problems like that but you are just more willing to admit it to yourself. you need to work through your issues.


By anonymous at 10,Nov,11 15:44

"most of you are just whining about minor crap thinking you have it bad,"

Shut the fuck up you smelly cripple!


By at 15,Jan,12 23:54

Finally someone that isn't complaining about easy problems . . .

Why don't you just find a nice babyfur cub (look it up) and pretend? It's not the same, I know. While being attracted to children itself isn't wrong, acting upon it by abusing or using someone is. Being with someone like that may be enough to settle the urges. You could see a psychiatrist/psychologist if it becomes too much. I'm sorry.


By anonymous at 01,Feb,12 21:36

All I wanna say that back in biblical times, look up all the instances of nasty old men and young girls. You'll be surprised, the bible isn't all what it's cracked to be...


By link building team at 15,Oct,13 16:17

xmxGax Fantastic blog article.Thanks Again. Keep writing.


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