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I feel worse than shit

Posted by anonymous at July 29, 2011
Tags: 2011 July  Juvenile problems  Relationship

I am 17 and in a relationship with a girl I truly love. I try my best to do any and everything I can to support and help her. I dream of her and constantly miss her when she isn't around. I never really consider it work or a burden because I love to make her happy. I try to let her know I love her and pour out my soul with my feelings. She is an amazing girl who deserves all the best.

Except she doesn't feel the same. We had been close friends before the relationship and I know she loves me, but she isn't in love with me. She only misses me sometimes and tells me that I don't "fit in with the rest of [her] life right now" and that I "don't feel right" to her.

Worse still, she has stopped herself when we are getting hot and heavy because she "can't get into it" and feels "guilty". It wouldn't bother me if I knew she wasn't ready for sex, but I know she is. We have discussed in on multiple occasions and she doesn't even believe love is a prerequisite for sex. Though I am a virgin, she is not. I don't think it is my looks because the guy she has had sex with before is significantly less attractive (in my opinion as well as others). She has said before it is her own problem and not mine (she has anxiety and intimacy issues), but it drives me mad.

I also feel terrible because I have seen her in a couple of relationships before as a friend. The guys she missed most and felt strongest with were "distant" (her own words) didn't really care about her (my own observations). I try to provide her with everything I can, but it never seems like enough. I know what disappointed her in those relationships and I avoid those pitfalls, but I think something must be inherently flawed with me. It angers me that she can throw herself upon people who won't make her happy and she can't be happy with me.

I know something must be wrong. I feel like a weight tied to the foot of a beautiful bird, trying to fly free. I need this girl but I feel like I am an impediment to her happiness.

She and I have spoken on this before. She really loves me and doesn't want to to feel bad, but I can't help it. She wants for us to work, but I feel more hopeless by the day. I want this SO MUCH but can't help but feel like I'm drowning. I can't expect her to feel a certain way she doesn't and I want to see her happy. It just kills me that I'm not that guy.

What is wrong with me?


Similar Entries:
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New Comment

By anonymous at 16,Sep,11 17:28

Nothing is wrong, she just likes thugs and badboys, she doesn't like good, genuine, law abiding man like you.

Forget about her, she prefers to have wild sex with wrong and stupid man than to have LOVE WITH YOU

By anonymous at 17,Sep,11 21:55

Oh God dude, I'm going through this too. I like this chick too, she likes me I like her, she just doesn't want a relationship. She called me today, I had to do something really quick, she said she'd call me later. I called back after 5 and told her I wasn't busy. She said she'd call me back later. I Texted her and yet no response. Idk what's wrong with me. I try to be sweet to her, and she said she doesn't deserve the way I treat her. She's been going through a "depression" she wants to get over before anything . That's why I don't say anything. She means the world to me but I can't see why she pushes me away. WTF did I do.
By anonymous at 07,Oct,11 02:21

You are being taken for a ride!
She is manipulating you. She's evaluating how much attention
and advantages she can squeeze out of you!
Everybody deserves to be "well" treated! Manipulators usually projects their guilt by making such statements.
Ladies enjoy being chased and you are running!
Depression issues before the first date isn't a good omen.
She's fucking with your head, GET THE FUCK OUT.....FAST!

I stayed years with a manipulator who a had behavioral disorder.

Check it out :

First phone conversations were about cock size (she was a total size queen)

First date, she shows me photos of when she used to dance for cash........great right, wrong she wanted to show them to my brothers, fucking freak!

Shortly after tells me about her finance problems with her mother, issues with her sister, work or whatever.

GET OUT NOW!!!! Advice from a fellow guy who got fucked over

By anonymous at 25,Sep,11 09:36

Nothing is wrong I don't think. She may just want to take things slow and get to know you on a soul, mental deep level. Souless sex is nothing fun. Don't push, wine or cry, it's such a turn off.Just hang out and be a best friend.

By at 03,Mar,12 19:07

This page will be high web-sites.

By Kishor at 13,Sep,12 12:49

Jeri Davison - I liked the pirtuce of Katy with her hands as a heart over the baby. That was very sweet with a very artsy touch. Also I liked the last color pirtuce where Katy is looking down at her stomach. Nice job Jenny! JeriNovember 19, 2008 6:56 pm

By Caelyn at 15,May,17 01:33

And to think I was going to talk to sonmeoe in person about this.

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