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Nothing was not bad nor was it right

Posted by confused at November 17, 2011
Tags: Meaninglessness  2011 November

I am 57 male,without a single friend in this world.But,god has been good to me always.Looking back,I can see the blunders I have been through.I used to masturbate a lot even when I was a very small kid.It used to give a sort of comfortable pleasure after.I used to stammer a lot,and that made me the laughing stock and object of being ridiculed by everyone,small and big people alike.My father was a stern man,who had never really given us anything like other peoples dad,but is quick to scorn and scold and beat me everytime he gets a chance.By the time I crossed my 18th age I cannot control my desire for a physical sexual relationship with a woman.And thus I got involved with a widow 10years my senior.Even from the first experience itself,I found out this is the only real pleasure I got in my life,and I hung on to her for 7 years.She too was willing,so much so that,I can go and have her any time and place I feel like.Even in a conservative society like mine,I used to signal her to come out when there are guests around,and make her come to the toilet where I will be waiting.I have even made her masturbate me in the midst of other family members without their knowledge.She was ready for everything.But the day I got married,I stopped going to her,and she too got the message.
But,now,after all these years,I am getting old,and as already mentioned,without a single friend in life,no one to talk to even when wife goes to work,I am tired and disillusioned with the world.I cannot get along with people at all,I desperately need something to do in daytime.But what,I dont know.How to make people like you,and accept you.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 26,Dec,11 12:22

Masturbation is not going to help you in life, trust me I know. You lose power everytime you give into sexual desire. Deny the needs of the body and strengthen your soul. Challenge yourself to become different than how you used to be. Say you're going to stop masturbating and stop. The devil cannot make you move your hand. You will have fantasies and wet dreams but don't dwell on it. Ignore it and move on. After a while the hormones in your body will lessen and stabilize. The more you fight the less it will have power over you. There is a better feeling of connection to God in the afterlife. Sex is not the most satisfying experience that exists, nor the wholest connection you can have with a person. Making love can be beautiful, if there is love but it pales in comparison to what is out there, even though you don't understand right now. Love is a sacrifice and you need to give what you cherish the most to get something greater. Even if you can't fathom how anything could feel better, when you reach that place when you connect with LOVE in the truest sense you won't even give sex a second thought.
By anonymous at 26,Dec,11 12:29

If you stopped having sex with your girlfriend right after you got married then you never loved her in the first place because that is not love, that is perversion. Having a wife who is willing is a blessing. For some reason the idea of adultery and public display was what aroused you more than the person herself. That is not love. And you should apologize for deny her affection. That is not a deal you make when you get married. The deal is that you fulfill each-others needs and save eachother from sinfulness. But you enjoyed the sin. Love is private. It does not need to be displayed. There are people who don't have that and you have to be considerate of other people's feelings. Easier said than done. But having someone to love makes you an extremely lucky person and you should have never taken her for granted.


By check out these guys! at 15,Oct,13 22:26

91HaTO Very informative article post.Much thanks again. Fantastic.


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