I'm 23 years old and am still currently doing third year university. Got my results about a week back and sigh, I'll have to repeat my third year again in 2012. Feels like all my friends are graduating, working and supporting themselves but me, my parents are still feeding me. It gets worse..I met a girl whom i really love while studying aboard but apparently she has a boyfriend. We got really close just like a couple and I thought she would break up with him soon, but now I'm back to my own country for my university break and she'll be going back to hers..meeting her boyfriend, which means I'll be losing her. I'm losing everything..
My family has high expectation of me because my brother's a doctor..I feel like I've been nothing but a burden for my family, sometimes I wish my plane would just crash so I don't have to make a huge drama out of committing suicide..but I definitely wouldn't want to involve all the innocents.
I'm avoiding the crowd and have been locking myself in a dark room for a few days..feeling extremely depressed. I have no appetite to eat, no mood to shower or do anything else..
It really hurts when people tell you that everything will get better but you just keep screwing things up making everything worse..I feel useless..I feel hopeless..my life sucks. | |
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Regarding the girl you met abroad, you made a mistake. You got involved with someone who has a boyfriend. Move on. Relationships when you are young come and go and you learn from every experience and use that experience when you find a long term relationship.
You seem to be blowing things out of proportion about how bad things really are. I don't say that to be mean, but really, you actually have a good life. You have opportunity. Don't blow it now because you are miserable about the end of a relationship. Get back to work and focus yourself. Finish school. You don't have to become a doctor. Find something that interests you and pursue that career. In a few months you will feel so much better and this will be but a distant memory. Trust me, I have been there. Things will get better.
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