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But still I move on...

Posted by mzchilez at December 21, 2011
Tags: 2011 December  Family  Life Story

Im a 25 year old woman that has a bright future.. I refuse to let my story get the best of me, but I will tell it and maybe I can help someone else... It started when I was young... My father an Alcoholic and abuser, my mother, a strong woman that had a heart condition and needed the working support of the functional alcoholic husband. I was abused but I know that you all saw that coming. I will not undermind my readers by saying that it could have been worse, but in my eyes, having someone you loved so much BEAT you, and break your spirit is the worse that a child could experience... My father then started to use drugs.. That was, for lack of a better word, INTERESTING!!! I remember coming home and all the tv's and electronics were gone... The money that I had spent two years saving, was gone!!! I was only ten... But I digress... My father got clean and life looked better!!! Then the relapse happened... I was 16 and now I had to sneak and work full time in order to make ends meet.. I payed the bills... He once again got clean and ONE LAST RELAPSE that sent him spiraling down the sidde of a road and wrapped his car around a pole... He survived... And has been clean since... Tragedy struck my family again... My mother passed away March 16 2010... She was my rock.. She died at home where I found her... I got up that morning and fixed my mother breakfast... I was on spring break, and she got up that morning and got on facebook.. she layed down for a nap, and never woke up... I found her on her bed.. black and blue... I burried my mother with ALL the money that I had... TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS... she had the heart condition for so long that she couldnt get life insurance... I wiped my accounts clean... I dont regret it!!! I loved and admired my mother... The loss of her was like losing my best friend... she was my EVERYTHING.. I could not imagine how I could move on... But I did.. and In March of 2011 my older sister went to jail and I became the sole provider of four teenagers... 13, 14, 16, and 17... I had no money.. No job and barely a place to stay... I had to now think about these children.. and so far it has been by hook or crook... but we make it... BARELY!!! I was enrolled in school and that helped..Now I cant get financial aid for school and I am one semester away from graduation and I cant get my degree because I cant afford it... Life SUCKS!!! but i can say that it could be worse i guess..


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Comments:
By anonymous at 22,Jan,12 08:44

Your story can give others inspiration. You had a lot of bad luck dealt to you from the happenings of those around you, but at least nothing physical has happened to you yourself yet. Hopefully in a few years the economy will be back like it was 10 years ago and everyone can have a good job again.


By at 22,Jan,12 11:37

School was kinda my thing, I've always been really good at it, so that's a plus. Senior year of high school...not so much. My grades have slipped and my confidence just took a nose dive. It feel like, I'm good, but just not good enough. Like okay, 79.08% in AP Stats...before I failed my final I had an 83%, who fucking fails the final! Seriously, I feel like such a dumbass. What I'm writing now isn't an FML story, that's for another day. What I'm writing now touches on my anxiety, the feeling I get when I don't please my parents or my college counselor. For the past year and a half, I've been working on applications, my college counselor couldn't express enough that my grades are a HUGE factor that colleges look at. I'm freaking out because I feel like I'm a failure and like I didn't do good enough, like I'm not good enough. I think that's really stupid though, I'm not perfect and I'm not ever going to be...so why should I care that I got a C+, a B and a B-'s, an A- and an A....I know it doesn't make for a very high GPA and it does reflect me in a negative way, but I know who I am and I know how good I can be. I don't want to miss out on anything because some college can't see past 5 letters that define the past five months of my life.


By smashing top seo at 23,Oct,13 11:29

3vyHcQ A round of applause for your article.Really looking forward to read more. Awesome.


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