Alright, my dad is a different guy. On outside he's a charming, outgoing, kind of guy. He talks to everyone and is pretty involved in his hobbies. But then your me. His only child and I got almost all of his rage. My parents were married from before I was born to I think they divorced two years ago, so a total of 15 years. He was very angry when he found out that my mom was pregnant. But life went on and she had me. I don't remember anything until like kindergarten. Then I remember my dad constantly yelling at me and telling me I was dumb and stupid and fat and ugly. I won't deny that they weren't true but what kind of father tells his daughter that? After kindergarden I changed schools and everything and at my new school I was bullied a lot because I didn't wear the right clothes or do the right things and I was heavier set and not all that pretty. But even through the bullying I wanted to be a school more than at home.
He started hitting me in the head and saying rude comments about my apperance or my grades. Then I played soccer when I was younger and I was really really good at it but whenever he would come to my games he would yell and scream at me because I wasn't doing it right. I remember one huge incident where I forgot to hang the phone on the cradle to charge, forgot to write a note saying when I would be home and forgot to lock the door and when I got home he slammed me up agaisnt a door by my shirt and screamed at me. Then my parents got a divorce because of money and I finally told my mother about what had happened and she was so upset that she hadn't realized or known. Now we live with my grandparents on my moms side and my grandma is dieing of cancer. It's almost Christmas and my dad has not ever given me a Christmas present and even worse this year I get a nasty letter from him saying a bunch of crap including I treat him like trash. Ever human on this planet is more important to him than me and I even wanted to kill myself for a long time and I started cutting. I have realized that he will never care but it never hurts to hope I guess. I'm thankful for what I have and my life and my friends and family. Thanks for reading Merry Christmas. | |
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