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i miss my baby

Posted by baby at December 28, 2011
Tags: Death  2011 December  Family

I was searching on the net about relieving the pain of a loss baby then i got on this site. i'm 17 years old... when i was 16, i got pregnant. i was happy. yes, true, i'm very happy. honestly, it's the happiest thing that ever happen to me.. i love my baby so much and my boyfriend too, he's very supportive of me being pregnant. we've already discuss about baby names. but when my parents knew, i thought they will support me. but no, they didn't. they killed my baby. they let me take medicines on force. of course, what can i do? i'm so small compare to them. i tried a lot of times to hid the medicines under my tongue and just spit it when they won't see me. i can feel it very bitter but i sacrifice for it. but, they caught me doing it and so the next time they let me take medicine they had been so sure that i swallowed it. then, they made many ways for me to be parted with my boyfriend. and then, they won. my baby died 2 months in my stomach. my family is very heartless. they never feel pity on me and my baby.
until now, 7 months had pass, i still can't accept my baby died. i miss my baby everyday. since he/she died, i never found true happiness. everyday i cried. supposed to be this month i will give birth to my baby. and it made me so sad thinking i haven't done anything to help my baby. if only i had been strong enough maybe it's alive until now. i didn't even know if it's a girl or a boy. i keep on blaming myself that's why a lot of times i committed suicide.but, i'm still alive until now. i wake up every morning thinking what's more to live?.how am i going to live life if my only life is already gone? i'm very depressed.when my baby died, i also died. it's very unfair, i want my baby so much but i haven't been given the chance to kiss my baby, hug, sing for her/him, hear my baby cry and hear it's first word. everyday, i wish we will meet and i promised that when that time comes i will never let my baby go. and i promised that i will seek revenge, i will give justice to my baby's death. maybe that time, i will be okay. My life sucks the time my baby died.


Votes:


Similar Entries:
I lost my husband August 21, 2011
my life is shit October 10, 2010
Life really does Suck September 2, 2011
Loss of my Daughter June 21, 2012
Just the way it goes. May 22, 2012



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Comments:
By at 27,Jan,12 00:55

I'm sorry to hear your story but you have to and must accept it and try to move on. Stop lingering in teh past or you'll miss the present. God Bless and be strong.


By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 01:22

I'm sorry about your baby. But at least now you have more time to go to school, because you obviously are not showing (through the many grammatical errors) that you have the mental capacity of a 17 y/o. Idiots shouldn't have kids. That's why there's so many people on welfare.
By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 01:31

you shoudln't be saying something like that by jus reading their post. some people can seem stupid not because their inherently stupid but because they are depressed. be considerate please
By at 27,Jan,12 01:32

you shoudln't be saying something like that by jus reading their post. some people can seem stupid not because their inherently stupid but because they are depressed. be considerate please
By anonymous at 28,Jan,12 03:41 Fold Up

what kind of person are you? yes she's young but at least she has the heart.. and you? i think you don't have any heart at all, or maybe your just saying it because you don't have kids? i think your just jealous.. OH, and why the hell would you care about the wrong grammars? at least she said clearly what she intends to say to people... i know she is not an american but she can speak English even though she's not that good. You don't know how hard she's been through, why can't you considerate? if you'll just post something not nice then you better not post anything.
By anonymous at 28,Jan,12 20:05 Fold Up

Douche


By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 13:41

im soo sorry this happened to you .... dont kill yourself over it... if i were in your situation i would call the cops on my parents (family or not) and watch them go to jail! no body should do that to you!


By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 23:42

Call the cops. They are criminals. They killed your little baby without mercy. They are so materialistic. They decided for you. They are assholes and brutal killers. You should seek justice for yourself and your baby. It will not return your baby back but will return your life back. Otherwise you will never feel happy again. Send these bastards to jail. They are no parents. they couled be grndpa and ma. Shame on them. criminals. I know your pains exactly coz I lost two babies and with them I lost my life. 7 years passed and I am sooooo sad.


By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 23:45

In Justice there is a life! Don't forget that. Prosecute them.


By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 23:48

what can be worse than baby killers?!


By anonymous at 29,Jan,12 07:38

I am very sorry, that happened to you. Your story really touched my heart. Maybe some day it will all make sense, when you find happiness again. Its hard, I know. But you have to
be strong to overcome your sadness now; or you will never know, what could have been. Don't blame yourself. It is not your fault.


By at 01,Mar,12 05:44

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By anonymous at 11,Jun,12 07:15

I feel so much pain for you. It wasn't right of your parents, I do think the thought they were doing what was best but it was wrong. Now you can put one foot in front of the other and try to get away from them so they will have no control. You don't have to hide the hurt, it was and is real. Make your life and know that one day you will have your little one in your arms...


By at 27,Nov,12 09:49

To be honest, I've aawlys had an interest in names.I was one of those girls who was 10 planning their family! Also, I have aawlys made stories, so I constantly needed names.Even when I don't write the stories, I generally aawlys have a story in my head need names lol. Also, names are apart of my core interests or are interlinked with them.History,culture, literature,words,children family are all parts of names or names are crucial parts in them.So, my interests are interlinkedI first joined YA for school purposes, as I often answers that I needed on here couldn't comment as I wasn't a member. I then ambled my way through the different sections, when I settled on baby names, as it is was one of the few things a person can do that was pure' if that makes sense.It's innocent fun.You can't cause harm you learn a lot. Also, I enjoy learning about names the cultures.Overall, I like helping people trying to help them find their perfect fit Was this answer helpful?


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By Mens Timberland Boots at 10,Nov,14 18:46

News of two bomb blasts near the finish line of the Boston Marathon


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