I was searching on the net about relieving the pain of a loss baby then i got on this site. i'm 17 years old... when i was 16, i got pregnant. i was happy. yes, true, i'm very happy. honestly, it's the happiest thing that ever happen to me.. i love my baby so much and my boyfriend too, he's very supportive of me being pregnant. we've already discuss about baby names. but when my parents knew, i thought they will support me. but no, they didn't. they killed my baby. they let me take medicines on force. of course, what can i do? i'm so small compare to them. i tried a lot of times to hid the medicines under my tongue and just spit it when they won't see me. i can feel it very bitter but i sacrifice for it. but, they caught me doing it and so the next time they let me take medicine they had been so sure that i swallowed it. then, they made many ways for me to be parted with my boyfriend. and then, they won. my baby died 2 months in my stomach. my family is very heartless. they never feel pity on me and my baby.
until now, 7 months had pass, i still can't accept my baby died. i miss my baby everyday. since he/she died, i never found true happiness. everyday i cried. supposed to be this month i will give birth to my baby. and it made me so sad thinking i haven't done anything to help my baby. if only i had been strong enough maybe it's alive until now. i didn't even know if it's a girl or a boy. i keep on blaming myself that's why a lot of times i committed suicide.but, i'm still alive until now. i wake up every morning thinking what's more to live?.how am i going to live life if my only life is already gone? i'm very depressed.when my baby died, i also died. it's very unfair, i want my baby so much but i haven't been given the chance to kiss my baby, hug, sing for her/him, hear my baby cry and hear it's first word. everyday, i wish we will meet and i promised that when that time comes i will never let my baby go. and i promised that i will seek revenge, i will give justice to my baby's death. maybe that time, i will be okay. My life sucks the time my baby died.