I am at an all time low. I feel lost and that no one is willing to help. I'm not even 30 and have filed for bankruptcy, still have 60k in student loan debt, can't find a job, moved cross country for my long time boyfriend and am stuck by myself all day every day. No one will hire me because everyone else needs work too, I rely on the BF for everything, am super depressed, want kids but don't want to take that risk being so far in the hole. My neighbors are losers and never shut the fuck up, are always drunk and screaming at each other at all hours of the night. I blame my parents for making me go to college because honestly it was not worth it, I blame the BF for making me quit my job that I actually really liked to emotionally support him, but he's not willing to do the same and always talks down to me. I'm jealous of him for getting to do what he wants, and don't see any future where I am given the same chance, which makes me bitter and resentful. I'm overweight and can't seem to loose any of it, have health problems I can't take care of because I'm uninsured and I feel like I need to start drinking on a daily basis to make this pain go away, even temporarily. Life sucks when you are never given a break, or even a chance; I have hopes and dreams that I will never get to see happen and think, on a daily basis, that I should just kill myself to stop being a burden on everyone that I care for.