I hate my life so much. At school, I have absolutely no friends. Everyone is so into sports and I'm not. So, they all act as if I'm invisible. The few "friends" I've actually made have all ended up stabbing me in the back. One of my "friends" started telling me how fat I was and how without her, I would be nothing, so I got away from her because she is in less advanced classes then me. Then, my next friend ditched me for the "cool kids." And then my other friend got mad whenever something good happened to me, so she always pointed out how fat I am and told me to grow up and realize that I'm a loser. A couple years back, this creep "liked" me and ended up stalking me, and since then, apparently all other guys who liked me backed off because of that stalker. Then, my ex-"best friend" started helping him get to me and she kept telling me that I'm living life wrong and that I should agree to go out with that guy because no one else will ask me. When I dropped her, she went after all of my friends and any friends I've made, so I really have no one. And I attend this music program at a nearby town so I thought I made some friends there, but they're all fake. And my best friend from there has turned into a bully. The other day, I said that I was upset and she said that her life is worse so I should just get over myself. She talks about me behind my back and thinks I'm a "drama queen." And at home, I can't talk to anyone. My mom has lately just vanished from my life because I haven't done anything that she can brag about to her friends and my dad wants me to be a musician and tells me to practice more. Then, he says he's SO happy with me in public and then yells about what a shitty performance I gave. THEN, he yells at me for not cleaning up the house,and then yells at me for not getting straight A+'s in school, even though he forces me to practice for at least 5 hours a day. I barely get through my homework. I don't know what to do. I know it doesn't sound that bad on this page, but that's because I can't talk about anything more without revealing really personal information online which could cause some creep to come stalk me, which I don't need again.
I'm really alone. I can't talk to anyone. It's gotten to the point where I've considered "accidentally" taking too many pills. A few months ago, I was by myself on my grandparent's apartment balcony which is 8 stories up and I almost jumped, but I didn't because at last minute, my little cousin barged in. I just really hate my life. | |
Anyway,please dont kill yourself.I love you.I dont know you but
I love you
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