LIFE SUCKS

what has become

its been 6 years seems like a few months ago some people say there's plenty of fish in the sea some say you only get one true love

i was in a relationship with a women she is the most beautiful women i know to exist i told her id always love her life was good it happened that she cheated on me she seemed sincerely sorry but it still broke me the relationship had no trust i became paranoid and we fought the relationship fell apart

if i had only known if i had any idea we could have worked beyond her infidelity
if i had only known how perfect she was in nearly every other way i could have tried to be constructive with my emotions instead of slipping into darkness as it turns out i was sincere beyond what i could have comprehended at the time when i said i would always love her

i dream of her i dream of her often i dream of her knocking at my door i answer and we just hug i dream of use just being together just sitting on a couch those dreams are the most fulfilling moments i have anymore and the feeling when i wake up in a bed where shes not, in a life where shes not is the worst most lonesome feeling i have known

i have family and friends and ive had the love of other women since but nothing i cant fully express this in words but nothing seems like it could ever replace what i lost with her and as a result life for me has lost something it ounce had something glimmering something bursting with beauty and energetic promise

i know iam writing this for myself maybe so it can be lost in the internet
i wrote that i love her in a log book on top of the tallest mountain ive climed that and this are about all i can do for my situation these days

and if you've actually read this far know that love is a miracle and if you have it and know it to be true then don't ever let it get away and most importantly never ever let it be corrupted


i love you all i know now and forever