I've been a bulimic for nearly 9 years, have spent tons of money on treatment and medication, on my disorder, some would say disease, to only have it get worse. despite those of you out there who think its my state of mind causing me to do this, i wouldnt wish this upon my worse enemy and hate every day waking up hoping to get through the day with my unreasonable impulses only to fail myself over and over again. ive become broke due to medical expenses, cannot afford a car, and any money i spend on food, if i dont throw it up, i have an extreme anxiety attack. more medical problems. my parents have given up on helping me, although they never really tried, as they themselves are drunks and drug users...so i figured my only escape was to try a new enviroment. i now live in the mountains where i somehow (didnt know it was possible) have developed asthma due to the elevation. more expenses. i now cant afford anything, still have my eating disorder, and spend whatever money i do have on cheap beer and binge food. everyone has given up on me, ive given up on myself as well, making life seem ever so pointless. ive had to sell everything that meant something to me, i steal food because i cant afford to buy it, and im on the verge of becoming homeless. a homeless, drunken, bulimic. | |
Drink some beer and smoke some dope
Around you neck, tie a rope
Get yourself a turdy chair
Tie the rope to the light up there
Jump right off, swing left and right
try to breathe and say goodnight
this part hurts but just hold on
in less than a minute you'll be gone!
Now please fuck off and post no more
about your fake ass life you shitty whore
I do not want to read your crap
please take a well deserved dirt nap
take it from someone who is now broke, do NOT waste your $ on beer and food that you waste by throwing up. i used to use laxatives. that's kinda a bulimic trait cuz i couldn't make myself throw up so i used laxatives instead. it was gross and i spent so much $ on junk food and laxatives. what a waste of my time and $. i look back on it and think how stupid i was. i did this for 2 years and my wake up call was when i lost a job cuz of my problem. i could NOT go to work cuz i was on the toilet. i wish i could go back and do it all different. it really ruins your life and digestion. it took me years to get my stomach working properly again and all for what? that feeling you get after "emptying" yourself of food and feeling good. that is a feeling i was addicted after purging. i know how it feels. but it only lasts a short time. a short high. it's like drugs. so much pain and trouble to only get a few measly hours of feeling high and happy. NOT worth it cuz it all comes crashing down and you're killing yourself. please get better and figure out what it is that can make you quit this vicious cycle. it's in your hands. i wish you luck.
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