Stop Anxiety
and panic attacks

Dating advice
for women over 30

Save Your Relationship
No Matter How Bad
Your Situation Appears

How to overcome
your loneliness

LIFE SUCKS

Stories submitted by real people.

[Tell Your Story]

Bookmark and Share

Categories:

Abuse  Addictions  Alcohol  Anger  Anxiety  Appearance  Attitude  Bad Luck  Childhood  Crime  Death  Disappointment  Drinking  Drugs  Environment  Failure  Family  Friendship  General  Health  Independent circumstances  Job  Justice  Juvenile problems  Life Story  Loneliness  Meaninglessness  Mistakes  Money  Philosophical  Poverty  Prank  Racial  Relationship  Religion  Reputation  School  Sexuality  Society  Sociopathy  Stepdad  Stepmom  Stress  Tragic Events  Unemployment  Violence  


Archive by Month:
July 2012
2012 June
2012 May
2012 April
2012 March
2012 February
2012 January
2011 December
2011 November
2011 October
2011 September
2011 August
2011 July
2011 June
2011 May
2011 April
2011 March
2011 February
2011 January
2010 December
2010 November
2010 October
2010 September
2010 August
2010 July
2010 June
2010 May
2010 April
2010 March
2010 February
January 2010
December 2009
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
May 2009
April 2009
March 2009
February 2009
January 2009
November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
May 2008
February 2008
January 2008


Ads:

My fucked up head

Posted by anonymous at March 18, 2012
Tags: Juvenile problems  2012 March  Sociopathy

I'm 17, middle class, my family's still together...barely, I have a group of friends, my parents make more money than most parents in my neighbourhood, I should be happy, I should have nothing to complain about. But I feel like shit, everyday.

Everyday I go through the motions of life. School is horrible. I get bad marks, I can't concentrate or "see" properly tho I have 20/20 vision. I think I have brain damage.

I have Social anxiety disorder, I think i'm psychotic, OCD. I also have severe DPD/DR which is the worst thing in my life, coupled with my extreme feelings of loneliness and feelings that I've damaged my brain. This is cause I've been on meds for almost a year, but also drinking a lot, taking cough syrup and smoking weed. I've been getting a weird reaction from Venlafaxine and weed, which leaves me feeling "dark in the head" as I describe it, and this time it hasn't gone away. It's been a week since I smoked with my cousin. I can't find any info on this feeling either. I wanna kill myself if this doesnt go away.

So I'm depressed, I have barely any real friends cause I've isolated myself from everybody because of my psychotic phase, my group of friends go against me when I complain about what assholes they are. The only people who are true to me I can barely talk to cause this DP/DR and Anxiety shit makes me feel like an awkward boring burden on them. So, I'm afraid of being alone, sorry, extremely paranoid of being alone in my life, of my future, of school, and all of these fucked up thoughts in my head right now.

Oh, and apparently I'm moving all of a sudden. In 2 months. I'm gonna have no friends, alone, no life and I'm gonna have to do a victory lap in high school.
I'm getting off of Venlafaxine after only about a month being on them. Maybe that's why I couldn't sleep for shit this march break. And tomorrow school starts, where I'll go through the motions and keep feeling all of these feelings. I'll be late for sure tho cause I can't wake up in the morning. I guess I love escaping reality by sleeping, drinking, smoking and fucking up my brain.
I can barely hold onto reality anymore. I think I need new friends and a new life. Fuck this.

I want to die.


Votes:


Similar Entries:
Underestimated May 7, 2011
I m a slut March 21, 2012
discusting world February 23, 2012
I'm fucked in the head July 7, 2012
Lifes so fucked i dont know where to start!!! June 23, 2011



New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 19,Mar,12 23:12

WTF is your problem? try being 30 making shit crumbs for money from your full time job and not able to pay your fucking rent, never mind the drugs, you spoiled little shit. AND YOU GET TO MOVE? !!! You lucky little shit.
By anonymous at 20,Mar,12 12:53

couldn't have said it better myself.


By Brandy at 20,Mar,12 01:48

first of all the meds that you are taking are not made to coexist with weed and acohol. maybe thats why your not sleeping or benifiting from the medicine that is prescribed to you. you have to stop with the weed and drinking.
second, if you were prescribed that medication then you had to have talked to someone that diagnosed you and then made the call to get you a prescription. did you tell them that you were taking other drugs when they diagnosed you? when someone is on any kind of drugs they cant be properly diagnosed. they have to be clean. so you can throw out any diagnosis you have.
prescription medication does not work with other substances! go back and tell them of your drug use. get clean and rediagnosed. sorry to sound repetitive.. just trying to stress my point.
hang in there.
By anonymous at 20,Mar,12 10:41

I'm so glad there are people like you on this site. keep posting your nice responses, brandy. :)


By robin at 20,Mar,12 04:45

fuck lifes shit...i have similar issues and m bullied at school...
By at 21,Mar,12 13:57

What a cunt....


By at 23,Mar,12 14:31

I know just how you feel. Your story is freakin almost like mine. I have the perfect home and not poor parents. I should be happy... still im the one outsider in family who just escapes from the world and reality by sleeping, disappear in music and generally fucking up my brain.

they dont know this really, i probably look normal on the outside but i for sure have social anxiety disorder and cant get close to friends. I doesnt work, and i have trubble making new ones as i cant get close to em.

I feel shit every morning. I had a boyfriend back in when i was like 12, but that shit is all gone. It isnt that easy anymore as i cant really say the right things to people. I feel stuck with this personality that came on my like after i was 13, so now i cant get out of it. Im just the nice one, the third wheel.

I want to move. Get a new life and get out of this goodgirl, boring personality.

fuck, i hate my life, i just want to die...


By at 25,Mar,12 00:37

I just wanted to add that i've felt brain damaged before i even took all these drugs. It's just now im really paranoid about it and feeling different things in my brain.


By crorkz at 23,Nov,14 11:46

dsBFIh Wow, superb blog layout! How lengthy have you been running a blog for? you made running a blog glance easy. The total look of your web site is magnificent, let alone the content material!


By crorkz linkz at 15,Jan,15 18:58

FFNfow Good write-up, I am regular visitor of one's web site, maintain up the nice operate, and It's going to be a regular visitor for a long time.


New Comment