I went out with my boyfriend for 10 month and it was the 1st time I ever was in love. I really thought he was the one and I put him before myself. There was time that he neglected me and I also thought that he liked some other girl. On December 19 he broke up with me because we we're having a lot of fights, but I was willing to compromise because I really loved him. We kept seeing each other though, but he treated me like total shit. On valentines day I made a big deal about it because I wanted him to ask me out again. I bought 30 dollars worth of food and baked him a cake saying I love you. He decided to go to band practice on that day and lied to be about being late. An hour and a half later he shows up and gives me a half dead white rose, which by the way he took from the dozen roses that his mom's girlfriend got her. Once we got to his house he didn't even help me bring the stuff in and we got into a fight and he kicked me out again! I went home crying and he didn't even care. Then on march 17 I went to taco bell with the girl I was for sure he liked ex girlfriend, and she told me the "truth". It felt like a bomb dropped in my heart to hear what she told me. I preceded to text him saying that I couldn't believe he would do that, that I loved him and that it was all a lie. He said it was all my fault and deleted me from both blackberry messenger and facebook. I cried for weeks feeling worthless. And to top this off its my senior year in high school I couldn't enjoy my last few months. I tried to get over him but I just can't let him go. He moved on got a new girlfriend which by the looks of it he likes way more then he ever liked me. But, I'm still in love with him after everything he put me through, I cry myself to sleep to this very day and I'm lossing my friends because I'm to depressed all the time. Just to make things worse since the only way I can be happy is by getting really drunk to the point that I black out, I've gotten home super late which is causing my parents to split up and worse of all it cause me to get raped once not so long ago. I really wish that he could love me again and I wish he would be there for my graduation. I don't know what to do about this problem, I'm going to college soon and I seem not wanted to do anything but cry and drink myself to sleep. My life just sucks at the moment. | |
You know that you tried to change him, and that didnt' work. You should have tried to talk to him and tell him you want him to take you out more, before all this mess happens. But you didn't, and I think that's why you can't let go, because it all went so fast and you didnt get the chance to solve your problems peacefully and tell make him understand how you feel, and clear the misunderstandings (which I'm sure there were), and I think you somehow regret not having done that while you still could.
He was an ass too, I'll grant you that. And there are other guys out there who will be nicer, it's not really fair for them to stay stuck on him.
So, hoping that you will keep all that in mind, and that it will help you go better, I wish you good luck from all my heart.
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