LIFE SUCKS

Fuck this

I don't know how to do this anymore. I don't know where to start. I am 24.iman artist which doesn't matter to this society anymore. I want to die on the daily. All I've ever wanted in life is my dad to except me and I'm now realizing how much of a piece of shit he is and how much I don't want anything to do with him. He tells me how worthless I am. He tells me I'll be one of the many homeless people that liven our main street. He tells me I'll wont get it and when I do it'll be too late . He tells me things like I'm too pretty to live the life Ido but I live in a house that he pays for. I quit school because I failed so many times. I quit my job because my dad humiliated me for the second time at my job and he makes me crazy. I don't want anything to do with him anymore. But where do I start. I've grown up in a small town where my parents divorced. Everyone on this island knows me and my family and I can't stand my family. My dad makes me want to die. Every time I feel good about anything I do he will be there to knock me flat on my ass. I need to learn how to not let him bother me but I've been putting up with his abuse for too long. I would love to end my life and make him feel the reality of how he treats me. He might as well have killed me. He faked loving my mom when they married. He had meandmy brother who's sort of dealing with the same stuff as me right now but my dad for some reason is obsessed with him. I want it all to end but for Somme fucking reason I don't have the balls to do it. I hate my life I'm stuck in a rut that I can say has been my entire life. I would run away but where too. And once I get there my dad will probably find me and tell everyone there how much of a piece of shit I am and they would kick me out. How do I get this guy out of mylife with out ruining mine. How do I end all the negative that my life is and make a new one on the otherside. What will it take. I am weak right now but I know I'm stronger than people take me for and I would do anything but I literally feel stuck in a mess I can't clean.