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I hate life

Posted by 1980 in Va at June 8, 2010
Tags: Attitude  Family  2010 June  Loneliness  Relationship

I am 29 born and raised in Norfolk Va. Never had a good relationship with my mom all she does is judge me and cut me down for every move I make if she don't agree with it. She preaches at me about God 24-7 and I love the Lord but sometimes a person don't wanna hear that. Its like that is all she talks about 24-7. My dad died of cancer about 4 years ago and he was the only one that really understood me and loved me. He was not my biological father but he took care of me like I was his own . My real father was a drunk abusive ass hole I met him 2 times in my life and I hate the man. I got pregnant at 17 with the first of my 3 children and married their father who in turn abused me mentally , emotionally and then physically. he beat me at 8 months pregnant nearly killed me and my unborn baby. So I left and ended up in a homeless shelter. I had no where to go but back to the mother who is so critical of me. I ended up becoming hooked on prescription drugs and I am still hooked. I hate waking up in the morning and most days I wish to die. The only reason I have not taken my life is because of my fiance of 3 years. He is the only one I can turn to and be honest with and he doesn't put me down or push me away. I don't have to wear a fake smile for him he knows my pain and the inner demons I fight inside of my self every day. I used to enjoy life but now I get no enjoyment from any thing. I have friends but they are fake and really don't know or even have a clue of what I feel on the inside I have to wear a fake smile just to be kool with them. There is so much more to my story but this is just a short summary so I just hope and pray that one day I can truly smile again and feel hapiness. My heart goes out to each and every person that has posted on this site I know your pain and the darkness you feel and you are not alone and it feels sort of good to know I am not the only one that had lived in hell......silently suffering in VA.....


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New Comment

By anonymous at 12,Jun,10 19:32

All can say is my fuckin life is the shits I don't know if i'm ever going to make it to the next day.

By anonymous at 17,Jun,10 04:11

you sound like a typical stupid bitch enjoy life in your town!!

By anonymous at 17,Jun,10 20:23

TRUST NO ONE... You have a job and you know you do it well. Your coworkers, supervisor and your management sees it too. You get no praise. You are constantly picking up slack or covering and making excuses for your no good rotten coworkers and even management for the mistakes they make. And gee, you might even be good looking. How dare you. They're jealous. I know it and they do to. They treat you like garbage. So what do you do. You just come to work and do your job and keep to yourself. Don't even try to stick up for yourself because the minute you make a mistake (AND EVERYBODY DOES) they can't wait to come after you. Then they fire you and make it out to be all your fault so you can't get unemployment or black ball you. All you can think is LIFE SUCKS... But you know what? I'll be fine. I know I'm better than you. Remember...WHAT COMES AROUND GOES AROUND...I HOPE YOU HAVE A ROTTEN LIFE LOSERS.

By Microsoft OEM Software at 08,Mar,12 15:03

LkoiwB Very neat article.Thanks Again. Great.

New Comment