I would rather be honest than phony, so here goes. Its me, boyfriend and our three kids. everything seems to stress me out. i love my three kids BUT have a huge disconnect with my twins. its hard to explain cuz probably no one understands, but u know how u had that one true best friend and the really whole heartedly screwed u over once, maybe more and then ur just like, screw it and stop being there friend because u know a real friend shouldnt do that. WELL, thats how my twins make me feel. I have let them f**k me over so many times. everytime i reassure myself that it will get better the next time. they always get into stuff, constantly. i gave them the benefit of the doubt because little kids do get into things and do ruin things, but they will be five and still r doing this. i dont know how to reconnect when they have pushed me so far away from them. i feel like i dont want to communicate with them ever, at all. and i dont know what to do. one on one time basnt worked cuz like i said they have pushed me so far away that i just dont want one on one time.i know, i guess i am a bad mom for saying all that( then to top that off i feel worthless, like right now when me and my bf fight. i understand he works hard six days a week, and that i only go to school five days a week for 5 hrs each day and that i take kids to school and pick them up and grocery shop and clean and laundry and make every financial decision. he gets mad that i get mad that he comes home from work and plays playstation until midnight. " because he had a long day at work" disregarding what i do because he says its not i job. i just want him to do some of these things with me. stressed | |
Your twins are four years old, they are going to do things you do not like. They're children. Some kids are "good" and want to please their parents while others thrive off of "bad" attention - but if you are not "laying down the law" and being an authority figure, instead of a friend, do not expect shit to change. Venting via internet is not going to change how your children act, parenting classes will. It is also horrible that you say your children "f*ck you over". You're blaming them for your problems when, in reality, you're creating them. I agree with anonymous, step up and be a mother.
I feel for you though! You're a mother, and depression is clouding your thoughts. You're blaming 4 year olds, for something they can't possible have any control over.
You need to identify where your real problems lie. Find some quiet time, palm the kids off someone else, and get yourself in a place where you can talk to yourself.
Make a nice hot drink, and sit in a compfy chair and ask yourself, Why am I blaming 4 year olds for the mess I'M in?
.....YOU'RE BLAMING 4 YEAR OLDS.....
I haven't walked in your shoes, but I'd put good money on 'your problems being your own making' and not your kids.
Your kids NEED their mum. Now become their mum, they deserve it.
Paul
New Comment