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Wasting time and space

Posted by anonymous at April 20, 2012
Tags: 2012 April  Attitude

Compared to many tales of woe and heartbreak I've been reading here, I have little to complain about. You might even say it's not so bad. I work, got my own place, and I'm in a pretty good mood, most of the time. Not now though. So why complain? I've been unhappy as long as I can remember. I think I have "avoidant personality disorder", which means you're afraid of people and lonely too. I have few friends. My job is pointless, unfulfilling, and I've been there so long now that it will be difficult to explain why to potential future employers. My apartment is tiny, dirty, messy and I've been here for years. I don't like or respect myself. In my free time I fantasize about being someone else (I've done so since childhood.) I am such a pessimist I feel any attempt at change will be for the worse. I'm serving time in a prison of my own making. I don't know how to get out, not sure I deserve to get out. No career, no prospects, no real reason to even exist. I can see what my problems are. I've read lots of good advice. "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all," etc. I just don't fucking do anything about it.


Votes:


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New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 20,Apr,12 08:47

What you need, from what i just read, is someone who will make you feel what real living is. Find your special someone out there i'm pretty sure there is one intended for you. And stop wasting time dreaming about somebody you'll never be and start giving YOURSELF a chance to prove your worth and be loved by you.
Be your own fan,
friend,
lover.
Love yourself. Nobody's gonna do it for you. Hang in there.


By anonymous at 21,Apr,12 17:25

Clean your place, yourself included.


By anonymous at 21,Apr,12 19:47

get off your butt & take action..... just do it.


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