well..here is another life story. 16 yrs old seems like a long time, ever since i can remember..ive been... unusual,(that weird kid) i dont know what it was growing up..the fact that im 6"4. or maybe really fat. who knows but i was never accepted by kids. i didn't let it get me to down just kept going to school every day. i always hated it. failed my classes i was very unintelligent. if it wasn't for the spell check you would be seeing as you read this long story.lol. kids got worse around 7th grade. thats when puberty was hitting everyone hard i guess. lines were drawn on who were the "popular kids"..and the losers..(me)..i got bullied hard,
i dont even know why? i was at least 4inc taller than most of em.. i didnt put up much of a fight. being raised as a hardcore christian, i was more like a giant teddy bear than a huge fighter.. i never did make friends...just sat through my classes each day every day.. come high school i found that one friend. and who would o thunk he was a "popular kid" so just like that i got into the group?
but i didnt know why they were " the popular kid" how they got all the chicks
seems like they were praised by everyone even the cool teachers.then i took a good long look at it they were huge rebels, ya pot smokers, crime, doing what ever they want basically. being raised a good christian kid i despised that, but.. they were the only friends i got? so about mid way through freshman year.they turned on me..said i should just kill myself...like that i went back to being (the weird kid with no friends) puberty was helping my self esteem either i got hit with zits BAD! i was so badly bullied i had to drop out of school about a year ago..thinking online school would be the way to go..thats not true... like i said early i am very stupid to an extent i think i might be a lil retarded,so i dropped that,,just like that i was a 15 yr old who didnt go outside afraid of the worlds judgement.so my only thing i had to do with my spare time was wow/internet...now if you dont know the internet is a CRUEL place
i was faced with the phrase "THERE IS NO GOD!" so the only person that made me feel good when i was down if "fake" ppl always say there is no evidence or something stupid like flying spaghetti monster...that hit me so hard..of course im still a christian but...damn.. my depression got wicked bad. the the point where i was put into an institution..when i did get out i just went back to the usual wow and internet. luckily i found something outside of religion that made me happy. i came across a community knows as "brony" a bunch of kids my age who like mlp.. something about the show i dont know..maybe it was the message of friendship i never got from anyone.. i admit its a lil...childish..but wtf i dont care, but come a community on the internet comes..unspeakable.. disgusting things. you know? nothing crushes your fav show like gore and porn lots and lots of porn..ya pony..porn...FANFUCKINGTASTIC.so i went into a deeper depression. i was always taught as a kid drugs and alcoholism were wrong... so why were the "popular kids getting praised and fucking every girl they want for doing them"
i was taught it was a sin" just like porn addiction let alone..ugh.pony porn...
but WAIT..ppl are so sure there isnt a god..so where do i go? do i continue being a christian and be marked as stupid? or do i drop it and have a huge hole in my chest and feel..useless..unwanted..unloved..on top of all that all my family seem to be dieing all at all at once...at least they go to heaven..O WAIT
ppl are sure they just sit in the ground and rot..well thats my story..thanks for reading.god bless