LIFE SUCKS : July 2012

jobless and hopless fuck

Im fucking 24, And i hate this piece of shit life at times i'm stuck in a college program for fucking 5 years which should have been done 2 yrs ago. Life fuking sucks ass when you really can't enjoy what your studying. I wish i could move out but where the fuck can i get the cash if no one wants to give me a job. I can't find a single fucking job and I hate the new idiotic and completely assholic job system which requires you to answer 50 question for a god damn cashier job. Seriously you stupid mother fucking employers when a guy comes into your store and tries to meet you personally to show initiative to work what do you do? This is what you do oh please fill out our stupid fucking application online because you coming from god knows how fucking far away to apply doesn't count. I Hope All You HR Fucks die in the lowest pit hell for your stupid fucking surveys along with your stupid dumbass lackey employers. FUCK you every employer in mississauga Ontario especially the ones at square one, erin mills town center and heartland.

Very Lonely

Hi I am a 15 year old boy who is very lonely. My sister returned from college last week and while she is chatting up her friends and hanging out with my cousins, I am sitting at my computer and sometimes cry in the bathroom for hours. All of my relatives treat me like a 5 year old, and my sister is the one that gets all of the attention. I got diagnosed with Aspergers when I was a little boy. Everyone at my school thinks I'm a fuck up, a person even said that my mom should have aborted me. i alway have bad marks, and whenever I try to have a conversation with someone, they go away from me because i'm "really creepy". It's not like i can control it! No one at my school knows about my condition yet. My sister is the cook, the person that every one likes, and has a lot of friends. I, however, am an amateur musician, the baby, the person who has no friends, and who is ugly and has raging acne.

My life with my family sucks

since I was 14 I waited nine years to go to England nut we dont because my parentsdoesnt care at all.every time in my vacation I always study and never have fun my life is bad my big brother is calling me bad word and my mother laugh and join my brother to make fun of me.when I open my playstation she tells me to close and study and my brothers enjoy playing.my mother is selfish she takes my iPad 2 and delete my games and my account treating like her own iPad . In my school I get bullied when I fight back I get beaten and my brother join the bully to beat me. I felt very angry and told my dad what happen . But deosnt believe me but grounded my in my holiday for a month.but when I became 15 i finish my igsce and got 5 a star and 2 b buty mother ripped my report and tells me do it all again and study all your vacation.like come in what the fuck it's not fucking fair they all have fun and travel while I am alone in the house.so I had no choice but to escape thus nightmare in 9 years so I left the family alone having my own life and adopted to a better family but my worse family came back to take me home but I don't want then I was arrest by the cops and held 3 day prison when I was free my fucking asshole family started beating me up. So please from this bullshited family because I can't take it any more what do I do escape again or kill myself for hope?!

oh joy

38,uneducated, crap job, man tits, verbal abusive GF, ave size c@ck, no sex(see verbal abusive GF) old car gray hair starting, out of shape, no mom, lost true love of life, best friends dead, drunk right now. I feel like a zombie just walking around in a daze because life has kicked me in the balls so many times that, all I can do is just walk it off, and proceed to the next ball kicking moment that is my life.

My miserable life

I was diagnosed with lupus, which is an incurable disease, two years ago. Upon diagnosis my entire family deserted me. My husband is a cruel, lazy ass bastard. My in laws are assholes. My husband refuses to help out around the house, even though I am sick and dying. He refuses to take an interest in my health and will not attend doctor or medical appointments with me. He hasn't shown any interest in me in two years. I haven't had sex or been touched or kissed or hugged in two years since I got sick. I am so very lonely and sick everyday and scared about dying alone. I have no one to talk to. I am on chemo and a lot of other meds that make me really really Ill. I struggle everyday to keep up on chores and take care of my kids. All my husband does is sleep. I am just so sick of everything. I'm sick of this disease, the toxic meds, the loneliness, the anger and hurt of my family's desertion and the anger over my inlaws actions towards me. My mother in law hates me cause I got sick and her poor son is stuck with a sickly woman. I would just like to be made love to by a gentle man before I die from this. My doctor gives me about six months. I have informed my family, husband and in laws of this, but they all accuse me of lying. I just cry and cry everyday. I just don't know.....

Sick and Tired of This Piece of Shit Life

My Dad is such a stupid, fucking idiot. He cheated on my mom (or you could say the whole damn family) by going out with many girls behind our backs and eventually finding one to start a second family with. He's been with her for three years now and has a child with her, and the worst part is, the fucking dumbshit of a "father" decided it would be okay to name his new son exactly what he named me. I fucking hate him. It's like he didn't even bother to acknowledge the fact that his other son had that name, or the fact that he even already had another son another family. He is such a selfish fucking asshole. Even now, he spends all his time with that other fucking SECOND family instead spending time with us. And I think he married her after 3 years and he never married my mom after being with her for 19 years. He used our family as a resource for shelter, food, tv, bathroom, clothes for three fucking years and in my entire lifehe's never emotionally conne ted to me. Hell, we've never had a conversation. He doesn't even send us a little bit of cash to enjoy ourselves (we're poor as fuck) And because of that, my mom is always bitching and complaining about the stupidest shit ever. She turns every little disturbance into a huge fucking deal and in the end blaming me for it and explaining to me how I should be a better person and what I need to fix on myself. Fuck that. The reason I have all these problems is because of them. I blame my parents for everyhing that is wrong with m...

All hope is lost

I don't know what to do anymore. Everything I love turns to shit. I've always been that guy..the guy who supports you and lifts you up. If you needed help, Ide be there, ready to go and dully prepared. If you need anything. I'm your man.
But... Sadly.. no one I've ever helped has ever been there for me, and when I can't face everything on my own anymore, instead of anyone lifting a finger, I get judged, crucified, beat down, and left behind. Finally, I burst.
I've been in a relationship for 5 years, and it has taken its toll on me immensely. Sacrifices, compromises, and I've been there for her at every turn, even when I had nothing left. She was depressed, and wouldn't find a job to help pay the bills. I sucked it up and worked harder to compensate. It's been a struggle for years. It almost seems like when anyone I know is having a problem, I'm there with open arms. But when I'm down, or I do something wrong, instead of anyone saying " Gee I wonder if he is ok. He's not himself. Are you alright? Do you need any help?" Instead, it sounds more like "
Well you're being an asshole, and you better shape up and handle your problems if you're going to worthy of my time." I hate my life, and want to die. I'm so sick of being kind, and just getting screwed in the end. Of all the things I've learned, 3 run true.
Trust gets you killed, love gets you hurt, and being real gets you hated.

All hits you at once

I'm 19 years old about to be 20 in 30 days. Over the last year, I've lost all 3 of my best friends and the only girl I've ever loved because of my anger problems. Now, my walls are up so high that I've lost all confidence to even try anything with a girl now even when they're throwing themselves at me. Shit sucks right now. I want to go back to school, but I'm not sure what I want to do, I get drunk 5 nights out of the week, smoke a lot of weed, and my doctor diagnosed me with Dysthymic Disorder, which is pretty much a never-ending black hole of depression that doesn't go away unless treated. I've lost all motivation to do pretty much anything with myself other than slowly let my health deteriorate and let all my friends slip through my fingers. I want to feel like I'm worth something, but I always put myself down and I have the worst safety mechanism in my brain that prevents me from taking any risks that could emotionally hurt me. Last but not least, my ex aborted the baby we were going to have when we broke up, and 2 months later, she gets knocked up by her new man and their baby is due in just 2 weeks. I just can't believe how I can go from living young, wild, and free to down in the slums. I see no light in this tunnel of darkness. Shit sucks.

the curse of disease

My poor father had a host of health problems from age 36 to his death at age 79. When I was just a baby he had a bout with kidney stone and contracted dengue fever before I was born. In 1981 my poor father had his first near fatal heart attack. At least two months in the hospital. In 1985; 1991; 1992; 1998; 2001; 2005; 2010; and 2011 more sickness and trips to the hospital. Between 1982 to 1995 he suffered from severe toothache. In 2001 he had agonizing pain from hernia. I don't know how many anginas he had in the last 30 years of his life. In 2010 a stroke took away part of his memory and took away 90 percent of his speech. His speech was mostly gibberish and it was nearly impossible to communicate with eachother. And more trips to the hospital. In the last days of his life in 2011 a hospital bed and nurses aids were bought to our house. Diapers were needed. The body was shutting down. He was slowly suffocating from heart failure and also developed a rash. The last two months of his life was especially torture. On and off he would yell and groan twist turn and writhe in bed. Pure hell. Its a fucking horror. After he died we had to make funeral arrangements. Coffins urns cemeteries that kind of shit. And another distressing thing is in deciding whether to bury or to cremate. They're both HORRIBLE. Either way we're screwed.Its like being in a fucking horror movie.Nightmarish. Where is the so called loving merciful God in all this? My whole family went through days weeks an...

Depression

My roommate tried to kill himself a couple of times over the course of the last month. Beyond that, because of one of my actions, I spurred a chain of events that cost a guy every friend he had. He also has tried to commit suicide. I have a few other friends with a history of attempts. I myself have considered suicide, and have attempted before. I really wish not to now, especially seeing so many people I know thinking of doing just the same. I really want to help them. However, I feel dead to the world. I have disconnected myself from my family and a large amount of my former friends. Even the friends I'm with now, I have trouble striking up conversation with. For some reason I disconnect from the people I know the most; it's always me trying to end the relationship before they do. It's not even an effort, it's just something I seem to do naturally and always have. I used to try to purge myself of friends before attempts, that way nobody would care when I died; I figured I wouldn't hurt anyone that way. Basically, I'm one heck of dumb guy. And that's about that.

Why me?

i came from a really very overprotected family whenever i come from school i go staight to home. I've never had any friends but when i do have a friend i could never see them outside of school. In middle school people bullied a lot calling me ugly because i was skinny, big hair, braces, a long neck, flat chested and was always shy and quiet and that was the same year where i developed social anxiety. i have been through hell from middle until my sophmore year in high school. When i was 15 and a half i drasticaly changed i gained at least 20 pounds and it went to the good parts of my body. My breast filled out from a barely B cup to a DD cup, my butt went from non existent but to a J-lo bubble butt, i grew taller, I got my braces taken off and my whole appearance drastically changed. I got attention from people real quick. Guys that use to torment and bullied me start being nice, saying not only that i was the most beautifrul girl at school but that i was the most beautiful girl in the world and i was asked out on dates constantly. But of course i rejected them because of the hell they put me through and because i was painfully and disabling shy around boys. That's when the whole school got mad and jealous at me and start calling me a whore, slut and saying that i had plastic surgery. But i didn't care because i got use to all the harrassment anyways. I had never dated anyone in school because i knew that i would be saving myself for someone special and that i would lose m...

I can't stand it

I hate it even more now,all I could think of is anger and frustration and sadness. I am suffering from major depression and I can't heal myself.i hate where I am now and I hate everything about this country. All my life has been about caring for others Shit! But I'm tired when I'm being taken for granted. Nobody is truthful and honest.Fuck! I've been alone and lonely for as long as I can remember. Why is this life so unfair because it was made unfair for some people. I wonder everyday when will my last day be? I can't stand being here but I have to be here....
I've always hoped for miracles in life but once a blue moon it will arise and I'm thankful for that. Sadly,my life is a hard and depressing ones. People don't understand my frustration or maybe I don't understand myself. I wish to just go farther away from everyone ,I wanna run away to a place where I can start anew. I wish things were better and different... But who am I to change the world when I can't even look at my own dark world.....why was I borned hopeless and a fool when my name bears the meaning of hope.....

My life is unbelievably bad. I am a teacher and most of my coworkers think I'm strange and avoidme so I avoid them. fell in love with a beautiful 16 year old student and I think she was in love with me but we were both too embarrassed to do anything about it. I'm 43 and became obsessed with receiving texts from this student. some flirty, and some cool respones to me. my wife and I have no sex life no children and are arguing all the time. I think the only reason we stay married is just inertia. I don't have any real friends. And I live in a crappy spartment. What truly killed me was seeing the 16 yr old with a boy. Guess she got tired of me. That was incredibly painful. I continue to hope shell text me. Pathetic

im 21. I spent most of my childhood bein abused in the worst kinds of ways. my mother walked out when i was 8. i was homeless at 14, then in and out of care and sleeping on peoples floors till i was 17. i got pregnant by a man twice my age who pressured me into sex and almost a marriage. i found out he was cheating on me with a girl younger than me when i was 18. i have 4 psychiatric disorders because of the abuse i had as a kid. i have spent 3 years in court fighting for custody of my daughter. i have no money, cant keep friends because when im ill no one wants to know. the one person who i truly love doesnt want to know me because im inconveniant to his life. my family dont wanna know. im stuck in a rut and i cant see a way out because my disorders get in the way of everything. So yeah, my life kinda sucks. not as much as some peoples, i know, but still....

I can't help being a dick

Hey guys,
I know this is really gonna piss people off coz I have a great life.....but I keep on fucking it up.
I will break it down for you.
My Dad was a good looking strong, charming and quick witted mother fucker but was not good with women (cause for concern?). My Mum is from a broken home and her mum was apparentally sleeping around a bit. She was really pretty but fat. She grew up in a kids home famous for child abuse.
I have an older sister and an older brother, my sister was Daddys girl and my brother was ignored as a person but given a lot of help with money whenever he fucks up. This has led him to make a fuck load of mistakes and not learning from them. My sister got pregnant at 17 was fucked up for about 10 years but now she's fine.
I have always been ignored by my family and everything I have accomplished is 100% my own doing. My dad was an exceptional goalkeeper and I too showed signs of being a potential pro player. One memory that sticks out the most was me and my Dad drove to a football practice, he looked at the keeper and said "you're too small, you won't get picked" and we drove off again. My brother got a lot of support with his football and I was never shown the same treatment. I got to play semi-pro football in Japan through word of mouth but I lacked the drive or ambition to go to training (that's my own fault).
I was also great at songwriting/poetry from an early age but that was only found out by an excellent teacher that ...

Where Did It All Go Wrong

I have so many regrets. I miss my dead loved ones. I feel like I failed them. I think about the poinys in where it went wrong and there are too many points. Ive never enjoyed my life and when I tried, something bad always happened so I dont try anymore. I sometimes think about.moments where if I was a better version of me, my life would have been fantastic. All those moments I wanted to stay in would have been great if I was able to have been a apart of it. I had and still have so many physical flaws. Once I would fix one, bam! another flaw would appear. Skin, hair, weight, teeth, etc. I even became physically ill and doctors never catch it when Im having my worst days or have an episode. I had to do and still have to do so much to look normal. It never ended when I became a teen now an adult in my late 30s. And i missed so much and it affected my mental health. It also affected my life as if I wasnt this messed up, I would get paid more. I would have finished college. I could have gotten my family out. I have no friends, no relationship in over 12 years. And everyone I knew has moved on with having a life of their own. I live with a parent. I will not have kids to only be a single parent. Im so reprogrammed now that the idea of love makes no sense to me and is too cliche. Thing is, me and my siblings have some foresight gift, but it sucks when you seem to cant change anything. Or like when my bro dreamed his death while in operation and wouldnt tell us as he became more erratic afterwards. Sad thing is, so did me and his mom, but we couldnt change it. Its so unfair. It was so violent. I really hate my life and I cant seem to change that Im doomed. Maybe thos affected my family. Maybe i wasnt helping by staying to help financially. I dont know. I just hate this.

I'm a Wigger

Hi Everyone,

My name is Kris Ryzak. I'm 35 and I'm a white wigga rapper from Alberta.

I wear basketball jerseys and Nike sneakers.

I make 45K a year. I never went to college.

The problem is, is that I've been rapping for 20 years and nothing has happened.

I tried. Jah knows that I tried.

I just can't accept that I'm a 35 year old wigga makin 45K a year, living in a basement suite.

I have other issues but I can't go into them here.

Venting Tool

I am horribly lonesome yet I am disgusted by most and completely dismissive. I have occupied my loneliness with work to distract myself but it is not the same. I know I need somebody and want somebody but nobody qualifies. What a catch 22. I really don't think I just have walls up to protect myself as I am holding on to the idea that someday somebody worthy will come along...I just get impatient I suppose and cross my fingers that I do not grow old and alone...but even then, refuse to settle.

Genetics and being stupid

NOTE: I AM A GIRL!
Since the 5th grade my life has been going down hill with my body due to my genetics. When I was 10 years old they pulled out my baby teeth and told me I had to get teeth implants. I wore braces for 8 years because I didn't have three real adult teeth. My cousin is going through the same thing right now.

Then my hair starts to fall out when I was 10 years old and I don't have alopecia areata or alopecia universalis. I have female pattern baldness. Found a photo of my grandfather's first cousin and she had female pattern baldness too. Woo.

When I was 12 I felt a horrible pain and I refused to go to the doctor. I finally went and I found out I have a slip disc pinching my nerve. Months later I go back and they said I have a spine fracture. Great...

For years I suffered with seizures, but I didn't know they were seizures. I had never heard of complex partial seizures until I had enough with them. They bother me so much. I don't even have a brain tumor. This one isn't really genetic. I have no idea what's wrong with me.

I had horrible acne for about 4-5 years. I went vegan and I stopped getting pimples. My mother had horrible acne too. She and I suffer with acne scars. I think mine are worse because the acne medicine really burned my face. My mom also said I stopped getting acne because of the birth control pills. I don't know... Makes me question about my hormone levels and female pattern baldness.
I shaved my...

Bad Luck

Well not sure why I'm writing this since I try to be optimistic as much as possible. I'm 36 yr brown hair green blue eyes 6 ft tall avg build and hopelessly lost. I can't get anything right! I've struggled with jobs mostly way below my ability jobs like dishwashing. Even in the simplest tasks it seems I fail in one way or another. These days I live on assistance hardly enough to survive on. I've been single for yrs and very lonely but I understand why women stay away from me. In the last few years I've started takeing opiates like dilaudid and heroin. It seems the only times I don't feel sad is when I'm stoned. I've not totally given up. Like I stated at the begining I'm an optimist so I Vollenteer most days of the week but my sliping enthsiasim is a constant consern. Most of my family has passed away from one thing or another so I don't have anyone to talk to about my issues. Most health care workers just belive its the drugs but I've felt like this since I was young. Where in the world is there a place for me and will I be stuck surrounded by theives and other criminals who value me as a target not a friend.