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My Hurt

Posted by anonymous at May 27, 2012
Tags: 2012 May  Relationship

I'm 27 years old, no kids, no lady and I'm miserable. My problem stems from my lack of having a great lady in my life. Ever since 5th grade, I knew I really wanted a special someone. Her name was Ros. I'm a black dude and she's a mix lady. I always felt I wasn't good enough or wasn't attractive in her eyes. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, you know. Well I've moved on to other great ladies just to fail miserably. I say "great ladies" because of my respectful manners. But to be honest, they weren't great ladies. I've been raised to be a respectful man, honest, loving, understanding, patient, clean mouth, do-the-right-thing attitude type of guy. I don't blame the two ladies that damaged my heart the way that it is today. Their story is I was the first serious relationship they've ever been in with a guy. Both ladies stayed for 4 years each with me. The first lady was too immature and wound up getting pregnant by a dude who didn't want the kid. I felt good and bad because I felt like she got what she deserves but my other half felt that no one deserves negativity even after how she treated me. I wanted to marry her but now she's doing her own thing so that's good for me since I don't have to deal with someone else kid. My second lady is in the same category as the first lady. She didn't have any serious relationships with a guy before we met. I believe she started dating me only because she wanted to give something "new" a shot. She didn't date me for the right reasons; attraction, her liking me, wanting to date me, none of that. Her life was boring and she felt "why not, it's better trying this new relationship out then not trying". But I knew I was desperate. At this time, I'm 23 years old and I'm desiring to want my own wife, our own kids, and our own place and be happy. I spent 4 years dealing with this lady who doesn't love me like the way I love her. She's light skinned black and I think what she really like is white guys. There's nothing wrong with that but now I'm 27 and I felt like I wasted a lot of time dealing for nothing. All I EVER wanted is a great lady to be my bestfriend and make my life meaningful. I feel like I'm still in elementary school because my life hasn't changed since then. I could go on but I realize that my issues are not as bad as other people and I should just "suck it up", Grow up, be a man, etc. But my pain is real. I just wish my life could of been different.


Similar Entries:
untitled story February 9, 2011
No one cares my life sucks August 17, 2011
i dont even know November 7, 2009
Loving the one that doesn't love you back June 15, 2011
Life sux II October 28, 2009

New Comment

By anonymous at 27,May,12 11:12

You are still young dude. i am 28 pretty lady but sorry i'm already taken. your time will come.

By anonymous at 27,May,12 15:17


By anonymous at 27,May,12 19:32

You are sooooo fixated on having a woman in your life. Your problems don't stem from not having a woman in your life, you just have a low self-esteem. You think having something you don't have will make a difference, but you will still be the same person. Instead, focus on being a better person (personal skills, your job, being involved more in the community, your appearance, etc..) which will raise your self-esteem. You can be happy without a lady in your life (for now) until the right one comes along. You are 23-years old. You have time before getting married.
My .02

By anonymous at 27,May,12 23:39

Got dammit I'll marry you. If it'll make you happy, damn.

By anonymous at 20,Aug,12 02:16

Forget girls and women. Most of them suck. And forget other people. This fucking human race is a lost cause. I would just disconnect from people. Theres so much evil in people that Im misanthropic misogynistic and pessimistic. The Devil and evil rules this fucked up world not a loving God. I dont care if people ignore me or notice me. I need to get away from people.

By anonymous at 20,Aug,12 20:37

I comtinue. Fuck girls fuck women and fuck humanity. It would have been better if humans were never created.

By anonymous at 01,Sep,12 23:30

and one more comment. To all of you dirtbags who harassed me I say FUCK YOU ASSHOLES.

By anonymous at 30,May,13 13:19

Well if u wanna know the truth, alot of females from all races tend to:

Think they don't REALLY need a man. Sometimes they want a man and don't want a man at the same time. Which I think is so damn dumb.

Some of them don't have the ability to look a man in the eye on a daily basis. While getting to know a man, this simple ass female will get bored having to communicate with a man. This by any means is the man's fault. In my book there's nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with seeing/looking at the face of a handsome black man, especially if he's respectful and easy to get aong with.

Last but surele not least: Females are so retarded, they wouldn't recognize a GOOD man if he walked up and said hello. They'll judge men by how much money he will give them, his clothed, and car. They refuse to take notice of what type of man he really is.

I hope u find your soulmate very soon. Best of luck.

By Bettie at 24,May,16 19:57

Odd isnt' it, that in a country so where we are all called to "support the troops" and "honor our veterans" 90% of us are sitting at our desks on this "national holiday". Makes you think. Obviously profit margins are more imtoatrnp.

New Comment