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day to day

Posted by oliverplt at August 5, 2010
Tags: 2010 August  Environment  Job

Life does suck alot of the time. I have a masters degree work for the government and a retail store. I book over 60 hours a week, sometimes over seventy just to get by and pay the bills. I lost 2 jobs in the recession, I had to move away from the town I lived in for 5 years. My boyfriend of eight years moved there to be with me and after I lost my first job I had to move away and find another job. WE hardly ever get to see each other or talk. he probably will never marry me. I am getting old (ok...thirty now) and want to have kids...or do I in this crazy world. One sister is an ex heroin addict of 4 years, another sister and her husband are cocaine two older sisters mind you. My brother is having psycotic episodes...everyone thinks I am crazy.....I am a workaholic, I want life to work out good, but I keep working at a pace that is tearing me down and I fear that I am getting nowhere. The current is anything, is knocking my back three yards a minute and I am doing everything in my power to keep my head above the water and breath. I am running low on energy and am afraid that I may drown at any moment. I can't breath and have anxiety attacks more and more frequently.. I think I need professional help, but can't find any time to even breath. I am an empath and take on everyone else energy and that really sucks when you are around pissed off, angry, judgemental people. My head swirls and now my stomach and heart hurt all the time. I can't sleep. I am hoping it will one day get better...


I am not sure if there is a GOD. I am afraid of the water I drink, that food I eat and everything else because of chemicals we had infested everything with. Life is grand.


New Comment

By anonymous at 14,Aug,10 20:48

You are mad. You need to be institutionalized for being a public health security hazard.

By jon at 16,Aug,10 18:29

GOD icant spell your not mad your just a beautiful person and start beleiving in yourself one thing in life is thoughts become raealities ps we luv you

By anonymous at 18,Aug,10 06:54

i think for every one of us, life start to suck at one point or another. cheer up coze there are good days to come, you r very young.

By anonymous at 19,Aug,10 05:41

Be Strong because you are the only one you can rely on... Do no consider yourself weak cause whenever you does you will be one....Everything will be ok..

By anonymous at 20,Aug,10 21:36

Why do you have to work so much? You have a degree. Maybe you spend too much? Are you foolish with your money? Most people are. If you want to enjoy life, work less and spend less.

By anonymous at 06,Oct,10 12:32

Your an empath like me. You have to learn how control your emotions. you have to learn how to not take in other peoples emotions. imagine a ball of light surrounding you and protecting you. you also have to know if its your own feelings or someone elses, if its someone elses you have to learn to release those feelings. You also have to learn to strengthen your aura to not take in their emotions. there is GOD. You just have to pray for him, and let him know what you need. The problem with people is that they say there is no God that they God never helped him, well how can God help you if he doesnt know your problems? Also think about the blessings you have in life, think about the good unexpected things that happened to you. arent those a gift from God? for anxiety, i suggest researching about some foods and herbs to control anxiety. they are better than prescription drugs in that they dont have alot of side effects and they are much safer. heres some you should look up, holy basil, oatmeals yes quaker oatmeals, dandelion, st. johns wort,chamomile, kava kava ginger, damiana, passionflower, omega 3 fatty acids, magnesium, glutathione. be careful some can cause you to be drowsy and make sure you get the right doses.

By Nike Blazer High Dame at 13,Dec,14 20:40

Aku kemudiannya mengunci basikal kesayanganku. Cinta yang sentiasa membawa kebahagiaan kepada hati, =).¡°no thank you!¡± kata hayati yang dipanggil ?? apa yang akan si kecil ini teriakkan padaku disaat ia perlukanku.ibu mak ummi mama suamiku hanya tersenyum melihat gelagatku sambil memberi ciuman kasih didahikulamunanku menjadi semakin indah hari demi hariku usap perutku setiap waktuku bisikkan kata-kata indah pada bayiku teramat sayang padamu wahai anakku.sebelum jenazah anakku disemadikan sempat kusisipkan photo aku bersama suami di balutan putih tubuh kecil anakku.sempat jua ku ambil bekas-bekas kain putih itu yang dipotong untuk kusimpan sebagai pengubat rindu

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