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feels like im sentenced to hell without actually dying

Posted by anonymous at October 14, 2010
Tags: Juvenile problems  2010 October

im 16 and about 2 weeks ago i got into a massive fight with my parents so i moved to my neighbors and i have been staying there. I just changed schools to hang out with my Ex-girlfriend and some other people that i know.i still love my ex and i have known for about 3 months that she is pregnant with the child of the person she dated after me...I want to take care of her and the child, so a few weeks ago i gave her a note telling her exactly how i feel towards her and how i want to take care of her and the baby because i still love her and at the end i asked her to take me back. Its been 3 weeks and i haven't received a response but on Tuesday I asked her to go to Halloween shopping because we are going out trick or treating then seeing saw 3D, and after Halloween shopping we went to dinner and i got her these pink contacts and some spacers for her ears as a gift, and then we went to the movies. But on our way to the movies one of her friends joined us, i was talking to her friend last night and we got into this massive argument about me buying her things and trying to buy her affection (which i wasn't) and because i paid for dinner for both of us, the spacers and contacts, my Halloween costume, and I paid for a bag of popcorn and 2 drinks i am now broke and i cant eat lunch or dinner along with not being able to sleep in 4 days, having to take care of my neighbors kids as part of my living arrangement. All of this has made me very depressed and all i have thought about today was what would happen if i killed myself....and as im writing this i have picked up my alcoholism that i thought i had beaten


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