I read a lot of stories her about people that have had it bad. Many say they are lazy and dont try hard. Well, not here. For the last 35 years, I have worked at least 60 hours per week. My first wife, wasted away all of our money. My fault for not stopping her. Then we divorced because, we did not spend time together. Of course not, I was working over 60 hours per week, while she stayed home and did not fucking work. When I got home, I would have to help do the laundry, clean the house and help do the shopping because she was overwhelmed. Thenwe divorced. I gave her over $800 per month, got to see my kids, which she moved out of state only twice per year. While she got a new boyfriend, bought cars, boats, motorcycles ect. Then, the apple of my eye, my youngest(a daughter,says casually, that this guy raised her) I love my children with all my heart. While away from them, I called them 3 times a week, always, without failed, paid my child support, and even sent extra money many times. Now, I moved 1000 miles to be closer to my children, so I could see them maybe once per month. Yet, as much as I try, I feel like a total piece of shit that they tolerate. I am now over 50, I still have to work over 55 hours per week to provide for myself and new family. I do not get the boats, motorcycles or other perks many do. I work, come home and go back to work. It is not because I do not know how to have fun, It is because I do not have time. I am still treated like an outsider by my children. If only they could feel the total and complete love I feel for them. I am not upset because I do not have the fun things in life. I am upset because I do not have the important things in life. My family. Maybe it is my fault. I do not want to kill myself as many say they do. I just want my children to feel the love I have for them. No more, no less. I try to live a good and moral life. I hope they come around. But in the meantime, life does suck........................ | |
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