17 years old and i hate my fucking life.
i have had depression for as long as i can remember and have been over weight for even longer. thanks to the pressures of living up to every one elses standards i am now borderline morbidly obese. i have acne all over my body and find myself physically sick when i look in the mirror. i hate parties, i hate being social.. i feel as if everyone is judging me.
my friends have all had boyfriends and all i get is stuff thrown at me or verbally abused. not even glances of interest in my direction .. unless they are insults. i hate myself.
i want to end my life, i have planned it out thousands of times in my head... yet i dont have the guts to even end my useless life. | |
EVERYBODY has acne problems, it is VERY common for people all over the world to have this problem. The only thing is, HOW can you control it? For one, try to change your pillow case often, wash your face at least twice a day, after and before you go to bed. Don't have a poor diet, meaning eat healthy foods and stay away from foods or drinks that will break your face out. Do some research online and LEARN it for yourself.
If you are overweight, what are you doing about it? Are you just sitting there wishing the weight would go away or have you been trying hard to get rid of it? They say the more you are overweight, the better you should be monitored, so i would join some kind of support group or get a physical trainer to help you lose large amounts of weight until you can finish it off on your own. If you dont want to do that, start talking a walk around the neighborhood and when you can, expand your time up to an hour. Thats what i did and i lost 10 pounds by just doing that, along with training myself to eat every four hours (3 meals).
Yes, your friends may have all had boyfriends, but why compare your life to their's? You don't know what goes on at their homes or what they are thinking. Just becuase you see someone else's life thats better than yours, doesnt mean you should believe everything you see. You will be surprised at what all goes on in our world. You are 17 years old, you have PLENTY of time to find love, so stop treating this like it's a race. These are suppose to be the best times of your life.
People will always judge you, no matter how you look, what race you are, religion, gender, it does not MATTER!!! Nobody has the power to escape judgement. I've had plenty of experiences where people say mean things to me and yes it HURTS! The worst part about it is the fact that you will never forget. but why should i hate MYSELF just because somebody else enjoys making a show out of me? If anything you should feel sorry for these ass-holes who are representing themselves THIS way and you should feel sorry for them becuase thats all they know how to do, is be mean, instead of understanding, respectful and helpful. These are sad human beings who make other people's lives a living hell. I think they all should be shipped off to the moon becuase they KNOW your feelings are on the line but they say such cruel things anyway, meaning they want to hurt your feelings on purpose. such bastards!
If you are so down and negative against yourself all the time, what makes you think you are going to attract others? who wants to be around someone who is like this? I will tell you, it gets exhausting. I think your biggest problem is the fact that you are a little lazy, you expect your problems to undo themselves without laying a hand to help it out.
Start doing some plans to feel good about yourself.
You didn't do a very good job of living up to their standards, did you?
Fuck em.
There are so many people that think that have 2 be super thin i weight 11st8 and i don't care people think my children love me my family love me and if no one likes the fact ur a little bigger then everyone one else say if u don't like don't look u all need 2 start lovin and resectin urself i'm sure ur all beauilful women beauit is on the inside and it's not wat people see and it's there lost.I've been though alot and i've lost my son got beat up put in hopstial and i still come back fightin ur all fighter and u should b very proud of urself good luck 2 everyone just love ur self i promise ur love the feelin and u won't ever love anyone as much as u love urself try it i promise it work
I am 39 and miserable.
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