No job. No money. No friends. Mean ass ex wife who I still live with. Ultra bad computer spyware that only screws up the most important things and is nearly undetectable.
Paypal owes me 75 USD, but won't give me my password or redeem the funds to my account. I cannot drink alcohol or I will die. I am stuck as a senior in college, but am currently kicked out for getting a 1.8 GPA while on academic probation from hard times 2 years ago. I sleep on the floor with a tiny blanket that doesn't really cover me, and the ex-wife turns the heat down to 60 at night. I have this major cramp in my diaphram that spasms to my back and chest and arm. My ex is a massage therapist who refuses to help me (even though I rubbed her every day for 7 years). Every day I get up and she asks me to do about 10 things, and I was supposed to get a job every one of those days. She calls me names because I didn't finish school (God knows I tried). My mother talks shit about me not finishing. My grandparents fucked up this country (just like yours). The food stamps may get cut off any second now. All I hear is how I don't pay for anything, which is funny because I just spent $1400 in the last 2 months on her mortgage ($700 on a credit card). I spent all my savings. It doesn't look good anytime soon for carpenters.
I'm out of contacts. I don't have a room for my things. Every day I hear about how I smell and can't get enough done (oh by the way, watch the kids while I go shopping). I can't even have 1 goddamn friend. Ditching the woman won't help... Then I be payin' child support (which would make me a deadbeat since I have no income). Technically I am "very-low income". Can anyone afford rent anywhere? I am quite possibly the biggest loser. I've had four hours sleep or less every night for four years now, and god forbid I should sleep an hour in the day--I get mocked about how I have less battery power than wall-E.
My son, I fear, is a little conniving bastard because his mother has no respect for me. I swear that kid is not my son. She blames me for a black eye she basically gave herself on mother's day (no, I've never hit the bitch).
The only thing keeping me here is my daughter (who knows how long that will last). She basically got everything in the divorce, that's why I stick around (cause if I leave, I'll be called a deadbeat). I'm becoming useless, my foot hurts (it may be slightly broken). My nose hasn't worked properly in 20 years.
I get one meal a day (and it's a bitch because I have to hear about how I eat everything). I'm not allowed to have any of the food in the house 'cause it's not for me (meanwhile, they just dump 80% of the meal down the drain). When I tell my son to finish his dinner, I get guff. She's constantly calling the cops on me (which I enjoy, because I get to confront them and they cannot arrest me because I do nothing wrong, plus...I get to leave for a night or so).
albatross my ass...bitch is like a noose. I was the only income for over 7 years. We have the worst sex life ever (which is ironic because despite having an incredibly small penis, I'm very good in bed).
I have a unibrow. I was the most hated kid in school (Jr. high, high school, and college). I am totally confused because I have always thought I was a great communicator, but all I hear is the opposite from certain people. Being in the top hundredth of one percent of the population in intelligence is more or less just a slap in the face (it is absolute pure fucking torture having over one and a half brains in my situation). I'm surrounded by morons. My economic, social, and career well-being is dependent upon the whims of jackasses. It sucks so bad to be me that sometimes, I puke in my own mouth so I can swallow it (I do this while waiting for youtube videos to download). I made this website called www.notradesecrets.com, but can't do anything with it because I don't have the time to write down all the trade secrets I know. I suffer from migraines, but the 30 doctors I've been to won't give me what I need (20 vicadins a year or less). I have done more futile work than anybody I have ever met, and I can prove it. People seem to hate me. I am developing insomnia, indigestion, and ulcers. I could go on and on, but chances are you quit reading already.
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