i have no future. im 15 and im going to summer school for failing english. at home my life is shit and im constantly fighting with my parents. my dad is a complete dick who is so stubborn and if he doesnt get his way he starts a fight. i try and tell him i dont want to fight with him and to lay off but he doesnt and just keeps instigating. then when i finally lose my cool and say something he says im rude and disrespectful and always hits me with religious bullshit and how im "dishonouring my parents" my mom barely ever takes my side even though he does the same shit with her and they both love to gang up on me. life outside of home is shit as well. its not like im a loser, i mean i have a bunch of friends but... they never wanna hang out with me and they never text me or anything. i could probably go missing and they wouldnt care. so... im surrounded by fake friends. i used to hang out with them but not any more and i dont know why. fuck it. fuck life. suicide is on my mind a lot now and i dont know how much more i can take. i would have killed myself by now but i always think that "God" will be mad if i do and ill go to hell. ive almost given up on religion too because my parents are overly religious and have turned me away from it. they contradict the bible regularly and dont seem to notice. i hate life. i wish i wasnt born. the only thing i can look forward to is a new paintball gun. my mom said shed buy me a new one if i had a good first semester midterm when school starts. paintball used to be the only thing i was good at and i loved it until my gun broke. so i tried skateboarding but im shit at it. well fuck life, if things dont get better ill end up being another teen suicide statistic. good fight life. | |
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