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Life is beautiful

Posted by some_dude at February 20, 2010
Tags: 2010 February  Health  Loneliness  Philosophical

My life doesn't suck at all, really. I have a roof over my head, have food, and I'm well off. Live with my mom. I'm 20 years old, and I have graduated highschool and had a couple jobs since then. I spend most of my time skateboarding, I absolutely love skateboarding. It's one of the things in life that actually gives me pleasure. Used to do tons of drugs. Smoked weed everyday, did a ton of LSD and ecstasy, but I cut that out a year ago.

I really don't have much to complain about, except that I have never been in a serious relationship, and I'm still a virgin. Every girl I talk to, I seem to scare away, perhaps because I am a bit crazy. The last chick I was talking to was absolutely beautiful, but I pushed her away by being an idiot. Now she won't talk to me at all.

I suffer from a condition known as hyperhidrosis. It means I have excessive sweating in my hands, but I also get it in my feet, underarms, and sometimes my bum. It is extremely embarassing when i have to shake someones hand, or pass the controller onto someone else when we're playing video games. I suppose this is part of the girl problem aswell, as how am I supposed to hold her hands when my hands are dripping wet...let alone have sex with her. I've had this my whole life, and it's impacted my social life greatly.

Also, I feel that it is unfair that we are all blessed with life, but we must spend it stepping over each other for a penny. It just seems so unfair to me, and I can't accept the fact that I have to go to college and find a job, and be like everyone else. Again, I realize this is nothing compared to some of the stories here, but it all ways down on me from time to time.


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Similar Entries:
life aint beautiful April 24, 2012
id rather not be even though i am. July 27, 2010
I am so alone March 17, 2012
43 and i live in a van. June 20, 2010
I wish I was beautiful! February 16, 2012



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Comments:
By anonymous at 20,Mar,10 18:36

A lot of what you said resonates with me, I've suffered from hyperhidrosis since puberty (I'm 30 years old now) and still do, and it really destroyed my self-confidence and created a kind of underlying anxiety and fear of interacting with people that stayed with me for a long time. I went to all kinds of doctors (neurologists, endocrinologists, etc.) and basically the verdict was that it's because of a hyperactive sympathetic nervous system.

As you probably know, there is no cure for it. What really helped me was living a healthy lifestyle, going to an acupuncturist, practicing Chinese internal arts (Tai Chi, Qigong), and learning how to meditate and silence my mind. This really helped me calm down and realize that the energy of life is with you always and learning how to channel that energy greatly influences your state of mind. Also, maybe find a good psychologist or at least someone you can be open around and share your thoughts with.

Don't worry about the girl/sex thing. You're still very young, don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself and dwelling in the negative. You will just sink deeper into the hole that way and gain nothing. Take a step back and learn how to relax, get to know yourself first and build a healthy psychological center within yourself from which your thoughts and actions can flow freely. Once you do that, it will be a lot easier to get to know other people and build meaningful and intimate relationships.

I wish you well : ) Peace


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