I don't know where to start. My life sucks. At seventeen I had the worst break-up of my life, and as a result of that I had decided to enlist in the military. However, a pre-existing heart condition started to become prominent during PT. I had minor heart surgery. I was kept in a limbo for two years without being fully integrated in a unit, only to be randomly discharged one morning without benefits at the age of 19.
I went to college for two years without any direction, trying various majors and finding nothing that really fit me. But since high school I've always wanted to be an artist; I like sculpting and I think it would be cool to do studio make-up and monster costumes. However, friends have peer-pressured me into an EMS academy and I'm doing that now. I can't just tell my friends to go away; they're the closest thing I have to society even though they know next to nothing about me- my bisexuality, my ideologies, etc. I don't have my own car, I don't have a job, I live with parents, and I made the mistake of spending my money on a shitty school that I never wanted to go to in the first place just to make sure my friends don't feel like they're sort of hanging. So I do my art on the side while I go to this EMS academy, but I really am not as skilled of an artist as I'd like to be and I have no formal training. If I ever complete a project, I'd gleefully show it to one of my conservative friends or family just to get something along the lines of a monotone "Uh that's nice". I just want to go to an art school and have a fun life.
But I'm a failed artist, I'm a military has-been, I have a heart defect, I'm so socially awkward that I can't get a girlfriend or boyfriend, I live with parents, I don't have a job, and to top it all off my genitalia is small. | |
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