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Tragic Event Ruined my Life

Posted by Suzy Q at February 11, 2012
Tags: Death  2012 February  Tragic Events

When my son was murdered my whole life fell apart. My mind has been so messed up I can't keep a job must less find one. I isolate from everyone and at the same time I am lonely. I hate my life. Since I was fired from my last job things went from bad to worse. My utilities are being turned off and I am losing my house along with my mind. So many bad things have happened lately and the pain is becoming unbearable and all I want to do is die. I wrote this letter tonight to the person who killed my son. No one was ever arrested and now it is a cold case. I would like to share my letter.


You are the lowest piece of scum on earth. You only think of yourself and you are very selfish and evil. As a matter of fact you should not have the pleasure of awakening to another day, seeing the sun rise or seeing your first child being born. I wish I could take that away from you and all you love because you don't deserve it. Instead everyday should bring you misery and pain because that is what you did to me the day you brutally murdered my son.

I know you have not been caught yet but I know who you are and how I would love to torture you to death. I have been tortured everyday since you murdered my son. I hate you and everything you love. The hatred is deep in my soul. You did not just kill my son, you hurt everyone who loved him. I could not and never will forgive you. See, you stole my life that day and I blame every horrible thing that has happened to me on you ever since you took him from me. You shattered my faith, how can I believe in a God that would let that happen? I live in hell everyday without him. I want to kill myself but that would only hurt my family worse and I could never be as selfish as you.

I have not been the same since you took him from me. My head is so messed up that I don't know what I am doing most of the time. You have ruined me financially and I am losing everything. What are THINGS compared to human life? I know you don't know the answer to that. I don't go out and enjoy things anymore because there is no joy without him. See, you took that away from me too.

I am afraid to give love another chance because I am afraid that will be taken from me too. I am so lonely sitting here all by myself but I can't take the chance of getting hurt. I could never stand that kind of pain again. My heart is so hardened that if I tried to love again, I don't think I could. See, you took that from me too.

Because you murdered my son, I spoiled my daughter because of the guilt you placed upon me. I would not have done, or let her do, half of the things I did if you had not taken him from me. That was no justice for her because it has just made her life that much more difficult. Her life was already difficult and painful enough because you murdered her brother. You crushed her heart and I blame you for every bad thing that happens to her.

I wish you were dead and burning in hell! But NO your sorry selfish and evil self is still walking the streets. You have no idea what you have done to me. I wish with all my might that someday some other evil and selfish person will murder your child so you could get some idea how it feels to have your heart ripped out of your chest. Oh, I forgot you don't have a heart but I will keep wishing anyway.

See, you had no idea how your actions would effect others when you decided to murder my son that Halloween night. I wish dread, misery and pain like you have never felt before on you for the rest of your miserable existence.


Similar Entries:
wasted life September 25, 2011
A failed life headed into the abyss of irrelevancy April 14, 2012
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My sister is a sociopath December 3, 2011
I hate my life September 20, 2010

New Comment

By at 22,Feb,12 00:18

Wow, I have no idea what to say to that. It's heartbreaking. I cant imagine what you are going through. I could give you the cliche advice that your son is in a better place now and that he would not want to see you like this, that you be strong and continue on for him, blah, blah, etc. But I cannot fathom your loss. I think I would fall apart were one of my beloved family members be murdered. So all I can tell you is to get help. You really need some meds. I am sorry but sometimes they do help. You are suffering from major depression and it's understandable. Maybe find other mothers who have suffered a similar loss and share what you are going through with them. Sometimes that helps. I hope you feel better and it sucks that they haven't found the murderer. I am a total believer in karma and you should console yourself with the fact that he/she will get his/hers one day. Be well. G-d bless.

By at 22,Feb,12 09:58

oh my goodness what a horrible, HORRIBLE thing that man did to your poor son and your whole family !! i think that letter you sent (or going to send) tells it all !! I hope dies a painful death !! i hope nothing else will happen to your family !! and i wish all the best in life for you and your poor daughter !!

By at 22,Feb,12 09:59

sorry in my last letter i ment to say i hope he dies a painful death !! sorry about that !!

By at 22,Feb,12 10:50

meow~ It is proven, God does not exist. meowmeow for now
By anonymous at 22,Feb,12 23:01

Some jerk killed her son on Halloween for shits and giggles. This more proves that people are terrible. God didn't kill her son. God said Thou shall NOT kill. So how is it God's fault or proof that he doesn't exist? Ssometimes you are so off base. I wish you would get over your cat fetish. You aren't one of James Hopkins ex girlfriends are you?
By at 23,Feb,12 08:39

?? I didn't blame on that fictional god of yours meow. Who is james hopkins? god says thou shall not kill? No, egyptian started saying thou shall not kill in the first place. Then the one god religion took that from ancient egyptian who believed in multi fictional gods.

The point is that if that god existed, it would not had allowed that to happen. As that happen, it is proven that god does not exist. If there is a god and sit-by as the op's son being murdered, then it is a mere being that is different to your god.

ALl mighty, all powerful, created everything and let them kill each other! History tells us so, and the op has told us so. Don't buy into his son's BS in that 80 years or less and then get well done for all eternity. Yep, fuking hateful and fearful BS that is man-made in ancient time by human mind. meow~ There is no god of yours. meow~

Nope I am not replying your respond, but I am just trying to make my post clear after your understanding. meowmeow for now~
By anonymous at 23,Feb,12 15:24

If you love something you let it go. God did that. He let us have free will so we could learn rather than think of him as a controlling sob. We would never understand if he didn't do this. Unfortunately there is alot of hurting and being hurt in the process of learning. Watch Howard Storm on youtube. He met Jesus and there is reincarnation too. He said you have to be greater than Moses to get into heaven, so do you think well accomplish that in one lifetime? No probably not. Please if you want to have a serious subject grow up and stop talking like Henrietta Pussycat in Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood of Make believe.
By anonymous at 23,Feb,12 15:25

It's also an insult to the OP too BTW because this was a serious thread but you are using it for playing.
By anonymous at 23,Feb,12 15:30

...because if someone killed my son and I poured my heart out about it and the best someone could reply was "That proves there is no god- meow meow for now." I would want to beat the living shit out of her. You are an EVIL bitch and you are really wracking up karma neg points like its going out of style. Next time you want to play catwoman pick a less serious thread.
By at 29,Feb,12 01:52

Meowmeow said no god is no disappointment. Sure that is the best I can say, to make sure people don't hope for a fictional figure to protect them in the real world. Meowmeow left comment because of the poster, but not for the poster. Meowmeow left comment for others who will ever benefit from that particular comment. Meowmeow can't take care of the poster's feeling because no word can take away his desire for vengence. because vengence in his case is murder and one must not encourage with or without freedom of speech. There it is, meowmeow said there is no god to protect your family, stop praying and start to work harder on children protection. Meowmeow the name is playful, but meowmeow did not play, rather meowmeow gave out the realisation that one can have from this post: strop praying to it, it's fictional

Meow~ whoever it is posting as three different comments within 6 minutes, you fucking suck at making people think you are three different people. Meowmeow is not buying your lie and your religious fairy tale with my paw. Meowmeow does not lick bible on the cover to clean it's collective shit and dust like you do. Meowmeow likes to find educational value on posts here and sometime troll others for their stupidity. Meowmeow has not done that to the OP on this occasion. Meowmeow say "to science and Hollywood with your religious value." That is how meowmoew just killed your brain cell. meowmeow out
By anonymous at 07,Mar,12 03:13

Someone call the pound. There's a rabid cat on the loose.
By anonymous at 07,Mar,12 03:16 Fold Up

Ew. Shut up, feral cat. You're gross.
By mewomeow at 13,Jul,12 09:51

again you got sucker for posting two two comments at about the same time meow

meowmeow out

By nice penalty removal at 04,Feb,15 17:57

qjYZTK Thanks , I've just been searching for info about this topic for ages and yours is the greatest I've discovered till now. But, what about the conclusion? Are you sure about the source?

By anonymous at 13,Feb,16 14:19

stfu and deal with it thats what you get atheist

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