I live in a small area and I dont have any real friends, I dont really know anyone nice enough to call my friend. I had one okay friend who i used to go out with but now she is having a baby and we have seemed to have grown apart, but even then I still felt alone because it was always about her and she never asked me how i was. All the nice people i have met and enjoy being aound are always to far away to bother with or have there own friends and i always think why would they want to bother with me anyways. I have a boyfriend who is in the army but he is away a lot and i dont get to see him or talk to him much. He is the only one i feel happy with but because he is popular and everyone seems to like him I always feel like 2nd best I know i'm not but thats how i feel which is unfair because he does try and be there for me he is just so busy as well as being away and hes always going out with his friends. I just feel invisable to everyone i dont ever seem to fit in and dont have anyone to go out with. I go to uni and work and thats about it I spend most of my time at home with my family but i am different to them and we argue a lot. I was never allowed out when i was younger and wasn't allowed friends over and my parents couldn't afford to pay for me to go on School trips. My family have tried there best with me but i think this is why im like i am. Basically i have felt lonely my whole life and have never done anything really fun and am sad all the time i just dont know what to do anymore. is there anyone else who feels like this? :( | |
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