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I don't care

Posted by anonymous at April 15, 2012
Tags: 2012 April  Attitude  Relationship

Six years ago, I broke up with my girlfriend. It was a long distance relationship and not being around her very often hurt like hell. Eventually, I decided that it might hurt less if I just ended the relationship. I still loved her; I just wanted to stop hurting. Naturally, being the dumbass that I am, I didn't realize how much it would hurt breaking up with her. I did it anyway and I have not been the same since. I am constantly miserable. I have an overeating problem now and I've gained 120 pounds over the past six years. I have almost no self-confidence now. I have no energy. I have problems falling asleep. I have problems staying asleep. I have problems getting out of bed in the morning.

I haven't been with anyone since I broke up with her. I've tried, but it's like I'm dead inside. There are things that make me temporarily happy, but nothing makes me truly happy. I feel like life is worthless. I've stayed "friends" with her since we broke up, but it's tough. She's been through a lot, as well. About a month ago, I finally worked up the courage to tell her exactly how I've been feeling. I told her how much I missed her, how not being with her has affected me, and that I want to get back together with her. She said no, of course. She said that it was because she's been going through a lot recently, which is true, and that she just needed some time to be single and work through them. It hurt to hear that, but she has legitimate reasons for why that would be true. The problem is that it's not true. She just posted pictures on Facebook of her kissing her new boyfriend. What happened to her problems? What happened to needing to be single and work through stuff? She lied to me. She lied to me because she obviously does not care about me in the slightest--not in a romantic sense, not as friends, not at all. Conclusion: she turned me down because she doesn't want to be with me. Because I'm worthless. There is no hope for any sort of happy future for me.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 16,Apr,12 09:43

what is wrong with you?
In 6 years I would have gone through at least 6 girlfriends.
there is no such thing as eternal love. Over time the strong feeling subsides. This is built-in in our brain so we human being can deal with lost. People change and move on in life. To be honest I don't think you and your ex were that close to begin with. Anyhow, she moved on and what you two had before is no longer there.
if you truly love her you would be happy that she find someone she loves and just be happy for her. I'm speaking from experience here. I had girlfriends who we stayed together for years. And one day it was gone. I still think of her sometime. But I care more for my wife and son!
you should go out, find new love and open a new chapter in life. It may not work out every time. But it sure make you life more interest looking back


By anonymous at 18,Apr,12 14:17

Anonymous, I disagree. If there is no such thing as eternal love why did you get married? If one day it is just gone then there was no point in getting married because you'll just get divorced! That's why the divorce rate is so high.

BACK TO THE POSTER: I went through something similar in a past relationship. It took me four years to move on. Sometimes in life we make choices that end up being mistakes. The grief and loss from these mistakes are sometimes heavier than we can bear and we end up with a lot of emotional problems. First off I you need to cut all contact with her. Staying friends with her is just rubbing it in your face. It will hurt bad for a long time, but it will get better. Rely on other people for support. Secondly, consult a personal trainer to lose the weight you have gained and develop a healthy lifestyle. This will allow you to gain a HUGE amount of self-confidence. Thirdly, if you cannot motivate yourself to set goals and change your life on you own consult a therapist and a physician. They will provide you with the tools and the anti-depressants to move through it. Once you are stronger you can wean yourself from the drugs. My personal favorite: whenever you need to vent some anger listen to the Cee-Lo song "F*** You" One day you will look back and realize you're so glad life took a turn the way it did. And then you'll look at your wife. :)


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