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LIFE SUCKS : 2012 March

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    [Tell Your Story]  "The pit" (fresh stories)

    Tired of Trying

    Posted by Nemo at March 29, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Society

    Howdy folks, nice site here .

    Ok, to alot of folks, I have it easy.. I dont work, gave it up a few years ago and hit the road, Lived in a truck and spent my time out in the backwoods and desert just doing what I chose to do on a daily basis.

    after an insurance issue on the truck, decided to pick up some cheap land at an auction to give myself a place to park till I figured out what comes next..been here a couple years now.

    problem is.. I suffer from anxiety issues, and dealing with the stresses that everyone else pretty much takes in stride, throws me for a loop.. whats come up more and more in mind is why do I bother to keep putting up with it?

    Ok, hitting the road sounded good.. but in todays political climate, you cant have a drivers license unless they have a documented residential address where they can find you if they take it in thier heads.. so you have a choice of asking someone you know to allow you to use theirs, or driving illegally.. same for vehicle registration and insurance.. if you dont have any of those things, you are asking for a load of additional bs to be loaded on top of you..

    Property.. you cant own property in this country for the most part.. you will always have taxes (with a few exceptions) and again, it gives the government a place to track you down.. and if your trying to live as a non conformist and live your own life, it's very likely you will be dealing with issues of compliance.. heck, cant eve...

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    Comments: 2   Votes:


     

    I HATE MY LIFE I WANNA SEE THE WHITE LITE

    Posted by david trout at March 29, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Relationship

    Let me start by giving you a little history. I am 38, still a virgin, and I really wanted to be a cop or go into the armed forces. I got rejected from the army because of some physical problems. Dream dead. Same went for the cops. I have been working at this company for like four years and at a security company where I like to strut my shit. It really gives me the only pleasure in my life working security at the mall. So anyway, I fell in love with this girl at my job, things were going great and I thought that she might actually talk to me sometime. So I started to follow her around and got her flowers and braclets and stuff. What did the bitch do? she reported me to HR! I almost got fired. Two weeks later, they fired her for not doing her job properly, so I waited outside and when she came out I told her that I would always love her....She kicked me in the fucking sack and walked off. that has been six months ago and I still whack it thinking about her. I drive a black car that looks like a cop car, I actually pulled a chick over once and she noticed that my security uniform was from the mall. She hit me in the head with a lit cigarette and drove off. I just want to end it all, women are so damn shitty. I have been saving money for years, I wanted to live great and retire early but it wont do me any good because I cant find a woman to be with. I went on a cruise last year and the only people who would hit on me were these three guys from California. So I thought what the hell? I had to go see the ship Dr. after that, My ass hurt soooo bad. I guess I am not gay, or I would have liked it. I just want to do the deed. I might just go by carbon monoxide in front of the girls house who I still truley love. Then maybe she will love me back. I hate my life


    Comments: 6   Votes:


     

    first n last love--which was never mine--- N i m lone..!

    Posted by anonymous at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March

    I am 23 yrs old girl, student,living away from home, have a well to do group of friends,dat's just to say that it is well to do,no one cares, till now i dint have a boyfriend, dat's bcoz when i was teenage, in school, i really love a senior of mine, i thought it would b over with time, but even after 7 fucking years i have not even seen him , i cud not get him out of my mind,..............finally we were in contact thru a facebook, i told him every thing and we were not in a relationship but we were sort of together, we used to talk for long hour n all, this was like a dream come true, n i was happy, as quickly all this happened, it came to an end with the same speed, he does not cares its just i am the one holding it on though i know its of no use, i m in the same situation again.............Alone ........pathetic ....worthless..........suffocated........
    my friends always told me to move on and get over it, bt its my stubbornness which had left me with nothing, i really lead a difficult life. At the end everyone's gonna leave you alone, i am suffering the pain at present as well..


    Comments: 7   Votes:


     

    18 years old, what the hell is my life?

    Posted by Hard Knock Life at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Juvenile problems   2012 March

    Other people have ruined my life, screwed it up pretty bad. I have made few minor mistakes, and been crucified for them thoroughly. I grew up in Las vegas, but honestly, my life was bound to be rough. My parents divorced when I was 2 years old, and I went back and forth between both houses until I was 15 years old. At that time I decided to live full time with my dad, because my mom is fucking crazy. My living schedule went by my dad's schedule, as he is an airline pilot and is only home not even half the time. My Mom is mentally ill, whether she's Bipolar, BPD, or anything is under question. I do know that she is a fierce alcoholic, yet she manages to maintain a respectable job as a school teacher and has a decent house and financial situation. She's such an alcoholic that I specifically remember getting very drunk at 14 years old once or twice at her enjoyment. The stories of me growing up go on and on, I was abused mentally and somewhat physically by my mom, at least until i was big enough to fight back. I have moved so goddamn much throughout my life, an example is that I attended 5 different high schools, and i am just now ending my senior year. My whole life, the only thjing I've really seen myself doing is playing ball; I'm not much good at anything really. I played basketball and football my whole life growing up, and ran track as well. Before my Junior year of High school, as per my Mom's guidance and my own distressed, i decided to move to Oregon, where my whole...

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    Comments: 4   Votes:


     

    displaced steel worker and husband 52yrs of suck

    Posted by Mark at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Family   2012 March   Unemployment

    Where to begin?
    my dad used to be a member and custodian of a church, you know, keeping it clean?
    I used to help him, i was 12 or maybe 14 at the time.
    He used to regale me with stories of his conquest of women, i was impressed because he was getting all the girls and having sex with them. Incidentally, they were around the same age as i was and he was around 40 years old.
    One day he up and tells me about the great times sexually, he was having with a girl i was sweet on and was trying in my fumbling way to have a relationship with.
    He knew i was sweet on her, maybe he was trying to motivate me?
    Doesn't matter, i couldn't look at her anymore after that.

    During this time i was being mercilessly bullied at school, it seemed no one was willing or able to help me.
    My solution was to play hooky (skip school) until i was old enough to quit.
    which is exactly what i did.
    A couple of years, lots of hard drugs later, I realized i was getting nowhere fast and decided to go home to the parents and try to get myself together.
    I was 18 at that time.
    Only to discover that my dad had been having sex with my younger sister since she was about 5 or 7. My mother divorced him at this rate and i stayed on with her for a couple years. The drug habits were hard to give up, so naturally i feel on my face again.

    I decided that it was a cold ,hard world and i better get tough if i wanted to survive,,so i studied tang so do and everythi...

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    Comments: 13   Votes:


     

    Many of us did in that era.

    Posted by didiwastemylife.myopenid.com at March 29, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Relationship

    What did we baby boomers do to give our children the idea we would keep being parents to them so long? I mean actually parenting them well into their 30's and 40's? Why are we not allowed the cut off point that we allowed our parents? I left home as a teenager and worked and provided for myself. My parents are two of my best friends - even now and I'm 58. But they were let off the providing-for-me hook well over 40 years ago.
    I fell pregnant and got married, in that order, at 17. Many of us did in that era. I have been a mother for 40 years and a grandmother for 22 years. Why does it have to be such a drama to be a baby boomer parent and grandparent? Why does it have to be so painful? Why am I still fully answerable to my children, and wait, my grandchildren too?
    I was faithful to my first (late) husband and he to me(I believe)even though I only married because of the baby we had coming(he was wanting to get married). We had 2 more babies and raised them in rapidly changing times. I conducted myself in an honorable way for 37 years of marriage, until he died in a terrible car accident. There had been many times I wanted to flee the marriage and stayed for the children and then the grandchildren. And we, having softened and endured, were better at the end of our marriage than during most of it.
    Our family had been very close. But at his death we shattered apart.
    I have re-married as I knew no other life. My husband is a darling and we are happy. But the...

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    Comments: 2   Votes:


     

    so alone

    Posted by dansaysyo at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March

    hey there and thanks for reading my story. it goes like this... i have no friends, one bestfriend who has a family to support. last time i seen him was 2 weeks ago for dinner but thats it.. hes all tied up with work. i have some "fake friends", u know those friends and u dont really know about but still hang with them. I have problems.. im bipolar, mainly mania and depressiona alllways at night time. suicidal thoughts.. what would happen if i just died.. nirvana? or emptyness? shit nobody knows yet. too chicken to kill myself unless im off my meds for a while but i wouldnt feel right. im a drunk/pothead so go figure, im an addict. erecile dysfunction meaning i cant have sex, last 3 times which were one night stands i didnt get a hard on. viagra is far too expensive. all i want is a gf but there so hard to bloody find. life really sucks for me being an alcoholic/pothead. i do have cherished moments tho, 5 wonderful nieces which are preventing me from commiting suicide. anyways that was my rant at 12:14 in the morn. btw.. aliens built the pyramids.. watch the history channel. thanks for your time!


    Comments: 11   Votes:


     

    my life

    Posted by Blake at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Job   2012 March   Sociopathy

    im 30, have a degree,live with my dad and brother. but i work for my mom. she nags the shit outta me. so i hate my job. i dont have a girlfriend because im socially awkward and have not had intercourse in 3 years, only messing around. my brother has downsyndrome and even though i love him i am so embarrassed to take him anywhere because people stare at him like he is from outer space. i feel like crap, i always fuck up my friendships, so im always bored. i smoke weed everyday and i think it helps but it im getting tired of spending money on it. girls ignore me. my friend always tells me "girls can tell you dont get pussy". sometimes i just think life is not worth it and i want to die and not deal with this low self esteem bullshit.


    Comments: 7   Votes:


     

    Work Hard? Are you fucking kidding me?

    Posted by smlaa at March 29, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Philosophical

    Less of a story and more of a rant with some story.

    Poor people understand faith as hope. Rich people use faith as justification for their money/success.

    I'm poor but faith seems completely ridiculous. Faith in what, that things get better?

    I'm lucky to have a job, I'm also miserable. My medical, school and credit card payments are more than I make. My younger brother committed suicide 5 years ago and my mother died soon after from depression. My Dad hides his finances under my tax return to gather social security.

    My car starts most of the time but its about done for. My neighbor smokes two packs a day and the central air blows it straight into my apartment. I'm really tall and skinny so clothes don't fit. I have terrible allergies, asthma and indigestion. I physically feel like shit all the time.

    I need to keep my job for medication. Otherwise, I'm out of America. Maybe I am anyway. The spend / work cycle insane. I'm 29, I did a financial analysis today.....In 20 years I will break even. So at 50, I'm back to where I started at 18?!? University and Masters was a bad idea.

    I bought into this idea of hard work, school, good job. Will this education / debt gamble work? Maybe for some but not everyone. This is where faith comes in. If you believe, you struggle the 20 years. Maybe the cubicle grind works if you don't die from diabetes first.

    Right now...I'm thinking, just walk away. Some jackwagon can buy my stu...

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    Comments: 5   Votes:


     

    Been Lonely For years

    Posted by anonymous at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March

    I am 20 years old and in college and I am depressed from loneliness. I've never been in a real relationship, haven't even had a real close friend. I'm just not interested in what most people are (in things like partying and going out). It's been a full 2 years of being depressed, I've been somewhat lonely for a while but with nothing changing after 2 years of college it is now depressing. I am a christian and i've had strong faith, but that faith is starting to slip away. I just don't understand why God would allow me to be so depressed for so long. Nobody would suspect that I'm depressed, and most people probably have no idea I'm miserably lonely. I'm a D1 athlete (football), i get great grades, in public i walk around with confidence all the time (and I actually am confident usually), I'm at least somewhat attractive (Girls actually do approach me from time to time).

    I Get the feeling that facebook would solve this problem but I'm scared of having a facebook. I haven't talked to many girls in my life, and I really don't know how to talk to girls. I'm too scared to approach a girl and when they approach me i just don't know how to talk in a way of letting them know i'm interested in further conversation, (i'm not good at flirting). This is the reason I'm scared of facebook, it would reveal the fact that I don't talk to any girls and in my life (me being a fball player and what not) this would be extremely embarrassing and exposing.

    It really h...

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    Comments: 12   Votes:


     

    over a hundred job applications, 11 interviews and 2 retracted job offers

    Posted by sickofit at March 29, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Unemployment

    I am so sick of my life right now. Ever since September 2011, I haven't been able to find a job. I have sent off more than a hundred applications and nothing has eventuated. I am college educated with 2 degrees and have plenty of reputable work experience.

    On top of that my fiancee was made redundant from his job. I have creditors calling me everyday hassling me about when im going to pay this and that.

    Finally last week a firm, made me an offer which I said I would take. I waited for the the paperwork to arrive and after waiting and waiting I decided to finally folllow up on it.

    Their answer? "oh...we are going to wait to interview a few more people" WTFFFFFF why the heck did you ask me to start on Thursday then????
    After feeling desolate and defeated, I gathered up my inner strength to keep trying. I did a few more interviews here and there.
    Yesterday I had a phonecall and the company offered me the job. Neither the pay or the job itself was perfect but i thought that now is not the time to pick and choose so I accepted. They promised to have the paperwork ready for me today.

    An hour ago, they called me up stating that they have decided to retract the offer. How bad can my luck be. I am sick of this life. Im sick of trying and nothing working out. Sick of doing all the right things by people and getting screwed over. Feel like throwing in the towel!!!!!


    Comments: 5   Votes:


     

    life is what you make of it....i guess

    Posted by ms at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Attitude   2012 March

    i wish life wasn't so complicated. you can never truly enjoy life when there's so much to worry about. how am i going to pay the bills? is college really the only path to success? no matter what, the list of things to worry about never ends. i wish life were simple and we can just live without worrying about making a living and surviving in this money hungry world. i just feel frustrated, and i wanted to let it out. i don't want to live my life like a zombie, and worry about stupid shit. i want my life to mean something. to have value. right now i feel trapped and don't know what to do to change my life the way i want to live. i just wish money wasn't the number one drive to exist in this world, but that's not the case. it is what drives this world, which is sad. oh well i'll just keep on keeping on.


    Comments: 5   Votes:


     

    I don't know

    Posted by unhappy at March 29, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March

    I'm not really sure why I'm doing this. I think its mostly because I need to get this off my mind or I feel like I'll go insane. I've been depressed for as long as I can remember, I haven't really told anyone that, and the few times I've tried to reach out nobody has ever taken me serious. They all think I'm just making things up or exaggerating my problems. I get told all the time that things will get better, or that everyone has these problems. It has been 13 years and things HAVEN'T got any better. I feel alone all of the time, and in my head I just keep telling myself it'll be okay things have to get better one day right? Things change it just has to get better. I keep hoping and hoping, but nothing is different. I still feel depressed and lonely. I wish it just ended there but it doesn't. I've had OCD for awhile now, but for some reason (probably stress) its kicked in to overdrive, and now the panic attacks along with anxiety I feel like I'm losing it, like I'm actually witnessing myself go insane. I feel like there is nothing I can do about it. I have the worst time making friends because I just don't relate to things the way everyone else can, I can't trust my family for many different reasons which I wont get into because thats a whole book on its own. I've got nobody, but my dog Charlie..yeah thats right I talk to my DOG, I talk out loud to my dog like he is my best friend, because he is. I also talk for him so I can get a response, and I talk out loud to myself. ...

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    Comments: 10   Votes:


     

    CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE

    Posted by JIMMY JOHN at March 28, 2012
    Tags: Family   2012 March

    where do I start? I live in alabama and live on a chicken farm. I work for my papa who owns it and he only gives me $60 a month to live on and it sucks. my wife left me for the local pig farmer and i am broken hearted. shoveling chicken shit all day and then smelling like it sucks. I lost three teeth this year so far and look like a hick. My 3 kids are embaressed for me to even pick them up from school. I want to go down and buy like 4 cases of natty lite and drink it then walk in front of a train. I cant take this crap anymore


    Comments: 7   Votes:


     

    cursed girl

    Posted by Cursed at March 28, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March


    well i am CURSED. people say they're cursed but very few really are. For some reason my life NEVER changes and ONLY bad things happen to me. This has gone on for 14 years now. literally--NOTHING good happens to me ONLY BAD. for some reason...i cant make friends, cant get a boyfriend, im always alone. im STILL single at 33 years old and have been single ALL MY LIFE. I'm attractive but it's like im cursed and acnt meet ANYONE. Males who come across my presence just put me down or insult me-- this goes for ANY random male i meet. Men hate me out of jealousy b/c im pretty and REFUSE to date me- they just want to use/torture me for fun. My life has only been TORTURE nothing else. People come into my life to destroy me then leave or stay just to control/destroy me. The only people in my life are my WORST enemies who have put me through extreme suffering and controlled/destroyed me and i have no one else and cant meet anyone else. I'm a virgin, no boyfriend, no matter how HARD i look i can't meet a guy or get a boyfriend..im kind caring loyal monogamous...amazing woman and beautiful as hell but cant meet anyone.

    I live day to day totally ALONE, and not even a SINGLE FRIEND to hang out with and my life has been like this for 14 years straight with LONELINESS AND ALSO MAJOR SUFFERING MAJOR EXTREME THINGS that people have done to me and my life...i have suffered SO HORRIBLY and been through TORTURE...with NO ONE helping me. I used to think--someone will help me? but...

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    Comments: 13   Votes:


     

    Life is suppose to be hard

    Posted by Mister B-Don at March 28, 2012
    Tags: Health   2012 March   Philosophical   Poverty

    Ok I feel everyones pain and all, but I've come to the conlusion life is suppose to be hard. Everyone shouldn't be born with a silver spoon in there mouthes. I had a hard life and been treated like shit before, but that all that shit just makes you tougher if it doesn't kill you. I'm not saying that you shouldn't bitch and complain and vent about it but it is what it is. I'm almost 26 years old and shit has been hectic, but shit life is suppose to be a challenge everything shouldn't be handed to you on a silver platter. You got to get in where you fit in. Feeling sorry for yourself will get you no where fast. I'm poor and struggling on disability with little to no support, but there's no reason to cry about it and feel sorry for yourself. I work every chance I get, but that's life nothing is gonna go your way all the time. You just gotta deal with the cards you were dealt and make the best out of a fucked up situation. I'm no angel I've done some stupid shit that I regret but hey who hasn't? Your parents don't give a shit about you? Tough shit the way it goes. Your family act you don't exist? Tough shit the way it goes. I'm spiritual and I believe everyone should suffer like Jesus Christ suffered for us. It's time for certain people to suck it up and realize life is a challenge. Everyone that's rich ain't happy and peaceful shit most of them rich snobby assholes are on there way to hell anyway. Life is what you make of it in a twisted sort of way. Yeah you don't get to ch...

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    Comments: 6   Votes:


     

    Why are everybodies lives so fucked up?

    Posted by Knickerbocker3 at March 28, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Philosophical

    Seriously i mean it. I was talking to my friends the other day and convinced her to tell me a secret she'd been hiding for a long time. Turns out she cuts herself. My best friend has been self harming for over a year and i had no idea! And then i got into this depressing mood and started thinking bout all my friends lives and how everyones lives are so fucked up. Someone i know got kidnapped when they were little by their own dad, another person's sister died as a baby, another one got abandoned by her dad and then her mum developed some serious mental issues, and i personally got beaten up by my step-dad. Sorry, there really is nothing constructive or happy about this story, i just needed to vent. Sorry for making anyone depressed. Anyways.... bye.


    Comments: 5   Votes:


     

    My Life Should Feel Charmed

    Posted by SuzukiJ at March 28, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Relationship

    By all accounts, my life should be charmed. I am successful in my studies, I am healthy, I have enough money to get by, and I have a motorcycle that I love riding. The problem is that I am trapped in a toxic marriage.

    See, the big difference between toxic relationships when you're just dating and a toxic marriage is that you can never escape from your spouse. You can't just take your stuff and leave and never look back. There's paperwork. There's all those things you acquired together.

    I've been married a little over three years, and for the last two I've been miserable. I don't feel comfortable around her at all. I can't talk to her about anything important without having anxiety attacks.

    I put on 100 lbs in three years from being married to this woman. I don't hardly sleep more than 6 hours a night, and I can't think my way out of a paper bag anymore sometimes because I'm so tired.

    My life sucks. The worst part is that I got myself here on my own. Nothing awful happened to me that made my life this miserable. I made a decision to spend my life with someone I love, and realized too late that even though I love her, we aren't good for each other at all. Go figure, right?

    The only way for me to figure out that it was a toxic, codependent, draining relationship was to commit myself to a lifetime of tension, anxiety, sadness, and isolation.

    I can get out of it by filing for divorce of course, but here's where it gets really ugly: I love my wife dearly. I don't know how to tell this woman I love that living with her is killing me slowly inside. I don't know how to ask for her to file for divorce with me as an act of kindness.

    I'm tired of feeling constricted and controlled. I'm tired of being tense, anxious, and distracted constantly. I'm tired of wanting to jump off a parking garage at my university campus every time I go out to get in my car.

    My life sucks.


    Comments: 3   Votes:


     

    100 % lonely

    Posted by Gee1 at March 28, 2012
    Tags: Loneliness   2012 March

    I have just spent the whole day in bed.....again and it's been the hottest day of the year so far, this is a regular occurence for me lately as I just don't want to carry on. I am only 32 but have had nothing but bad experience, loneliness and rejection. At 18 months old my real Mum gave me up, she has a severe mental illness, my Dad brought me up with my step-mum step sister and half sister, I was blamed, mentally and physically abused and was admitted to hospital with depression and anxiety at the age of 13 through the unhappiness and loneliness I had at home. At 16 I was chucked out of home and my own depression got worse, at 19 I was admitted again to hopsital and moved away from the town my Dad and step mum lived, believing I would have a fresh start, I have constantly battled with severe loneliness ever since, I was with one bloke that loved but was sectioned at 23 (smoking cannabis) and it tore us apart. I have a series of disastarous relationships, liars, cheats etc and have no family where I live and recently let go of a whole social circle because they were using me and more interested in drugs. I have gone to university as a mature student and I am in my 2nd year but I come home to my own flat every night lost and lonely. I feel like I am cursed and that thins will not get better. I would love nothing more than to meet a great man have a family, security love and happiness which I have missed out on for so much of my life. I am pretty desperate and often think killing myself would be so much easier to this pain but I know I would never do it. Just wish things would get better, so unhappy.


    Comments: 3   Votes:


     

    Migraines, Marriage, and Drama

    Posted by anonymous at March 28, 2012
    Tags: 2012 March   Relationship

    I don't normally go on these websites but today I thought I'd make a change. Let me preface this by stating that I realize that there are people in the world that have it way worse than I do and that I am truly thankful for the things that I do have in this life, but I am currently getting to the point where things are starting to pile up against me, and I can't figure out how to dig myself out.

    I have recently just hit my mid 20's and I basically think I've hit as low as life can go. I continuously tell myself that it can only go upwards from here. Approximately two years ago I was diagnosed with a chronic migraine condition in which I am currently on some strong medications for. Even with these medications I am lucky if I get less than three migraines per week. Dark room no sound kind of migraines. This in of itself is nothing to really get all upset about, people have their physical trials and I am currently waiting to see a specialist but I do get down on it. The second part of the story has to do with my spouse. I was married just a little over three years ago to the person who I honestly and truthfully thought I would spend the rest of my life with. She was different than the other girls that I had dated in the past as she (A) was not a party girl and (B) was not bitchy. She was a church-going genuinely nice girl who seemed to have her head screwed on properly, so I was thrilled when we hit it off. I was even more thrilled two years later when she accepte...

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